Handprints on Our Hearts
by Angel Leviathan
Summary: Nothing was simple. Never anymore.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Handprints on Our Hearts

Author: Angel Leviathan

Spoilers: General for everything.

Disclaimer: Atlantis, characters, concept, etc, aren't mine.

Notes: Set in early Season 3. This continues on from a fic I wrote over a year ago 'Unguarded'.

* * *

Cooped up on the Daedalus was the last place she wanted to be. And probably the worst place for her to be in her state of mind. Elizabeth spent most of her days wandering round the ship, trying to be useful, ignoring the pity directed at her by those who knew why she was accompanying them back to Earth. She was officially off duty. She hated it. It meant there was something wrong, it meant people were being kind, sympathising, humouring her. It was what she would have done to anyone else. The time she spent alone in her quarters was unbearable. If she had been anywhere else, she could have gone for a walk, a run, anything to clear her head. All she could feel was pain. Guilt. And the ever present, somewhat stupid idea that she was letting the people of Atlantis down by taking legitimate, practically ordered, time off. 

It had started with a series of letters she had received when the Daedalus last visited Atlantis. Several had been from her family and a couple from the SGC. The news from her family had shattered her, the letters from the SGC had only confused and worried her. At the time she had ordered John to take over the city for the afternoon whilst she tried to get some kind of grip on her emotions. Progress hadn't been made when Elizabeth couldn't keep from crying for even twenty minutes for the duration of that afternoon and had got no sleep at all that night. She had barely felt John's comforting arms around her, though she was beyond grateful for his presence.

Her sister and brother in law were killed in a car crash. Some young driver out of their mind on some substance or another, too high to realise what side of the road they were on, had come out of nowhere and hit them head on. All three had died on impact. According to the investigation. Elizabeth supposed that they didn't suffer for hours on end was a small mercy. Her two young nieces hadn't been in the car at the time, thankfully. She couldn't even begin to imagine the pain they were going through. A letter from her brother said they had all rallied round to support the girls and were taking care of them, but that it was only a temporary arrangement. She couldn't fathom why it was only temporary. Somebody had to look after Ruth and Marie, for good. What on earth else would happen? They had also delayed the funeral until she could attend, for apparently there was paperwork she had to read and sign. She didn't care about the paperwork. She wanted her family back.

After being kindly 'ordered' to take a break, Elizabeth refused to let herself imagine her position was being threatened, and so walked back to her quarters, still, even after several weeks, mostly numb. She knew there was only a few hours to go until they reached Earth. She just dreaded what she was going to find there.

* * *

Normally Elizabeth would have attended a debriefing in the morning, as they arrived late evening, but seeing as General Landry had waited specifically for her return, to speak to her, she pushed aside her deep sense of dread, and her weariness, and followed him to his office. Daniel Jackson briefly pulled her aside to welcome her back, and she tried a smile she knew was unconvincing. Elizabeth knew he was watching her with a frown as she caught up with the General and closed his office door behind her. 

"I wish I could welcome you back under better circumstances," Landry began.

She sighed and sat down opposite him, "Its times like this I wonder whether leaving and always lying about where I am was ever a good idea…"

"Doctor, you're helping millions of people on this planet more than you'll ever know. I know it doesn't seem like anything in comparison to your loss, but I want to reassure you, you are doing good out there."

"…Thank you," Elizabeth nodded.

"I have a copy of the paperwork your family sent, it's a photocopy they wanted you to read over before you had to sign anything," Landry handed her several sheets of paper stapled together, "Just to warn you…some of it may come as quite a shock…"

She frowned as she took the papers, almost hesitating. Elizabeth quickly scanned the first two sheets, detailing where the money and possessions her sister had would go. Unsurprisingly, the first listed to have everything were her husband and children. If not her husband, then her family were to secure everything until her daughters were of age. Elizabeth was surprised to find several thousand dollars left to herself, along with specific items of jewellery that she knew their mother had given her. When she got to the last page, she tore a smaller sheet of paper from the back, as instructed. Her eyes widened in shock, the emotion itself almost making her want to break down there and then. The smaller sheet of paper was a letter, a photocopy of the original, in her sister's handwriting, detailing her reasons for what she had done and requested. And what hurt the most was that…after reading it…Elizabeth knew she could never go against her wishes. No matter what it cost her.

She set the papers down on her lap, trying to blink away tears, "I…you'll…you'll need to find another commander for the Atlantis mission then," she said, "…D-Do you have anyone in mind for the job?"

Landry shook his head, "No. We haven't even begun searching."

"But you intend to?" Elizabeth sniffed and blinked several times more, "I'm sorry."

"…No."

She frowned, "But, General, there's no way I can do this and-"

"Take them with you."

"Its too dangerous."

"Let's be honest, Doctor, Earth is threatened and targeted just as often as Atlantis is. In fact, you have better means to defend yourselves. It might be a strain, but there is just as much danger here as there is in your lost city."

Elizabeth stared down at the documentation in her lap, "…My brothers…my parents…could they…" she read the last lines of the letter again, "…No…she didn't want…" she couldn't continue. She suddenly wanted John's support. Nobody else in Atlantis had seen her cry. She wanted to cry and not have to worry about how it made her look.

"Your sister wanted those girls to have a future. You have the best and brightest in Atlantis. More to learn and more to see than the would ever do in a classroom. More than here. It's certainly a risk…but think what your niece-" he stopped, "…and your daughter-"

She looked startled, then remembered he would have read the letter.

"Could do with an Atlantis education."

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes, "…You wont sent most of the USAF to Atlantis. Why are you willing to disclose vital information and risk the lives of two pre-teen children?"

"Because I think they, and you, could do with each other's support right now. And if either of them turn out to be anything like you…Atlantis could do with women like they'll become… Because you wont forgive yourself if you leave your nieces with your brothers after your sister has requested you take care of them…and because, one day, you might want to tell one of them the truth about who she is," Landry finished, keeping his tone even, "…The funeral is tomorrow afternoon," he gently reminded her.

She nodded, "…I know…" she stood up, "If you'll excuse me, General, I need some time to think…and to prepare for tomorrow."

"Take all the time you need."

"Thank you," Elizabeth quickly fled the room before she could even think of crying again. She didn't know if she was capable of being a mother, let alone leading a city and being a mother at the same time. Karrin had requested that she take care of the girls, that she not ask the rest of the family to in her place. Karrin had wanted Ruth to know she wasn't her real mother one day, had wanted her to get the chance to know Elizabeth as her true mother. Their brothers already had children of their own…she couldn't push two more on them. And their mother's health couldn't take looking after two hyperactive young girls. But she would be risking their lives. Karrin had had no idea what she was asking. None at all. Elizabeth wasn't even sure if she would ever be up to telling Ruth the truth, or handle being a stand in mother for Marie. She loved and adored both her nieces, but… oh, it just wasn't that simple. Nothing was simple. Never anymore.


	2. Chapter 2

The funeral was hell. Not that she had been expecting it to be anything less, but she was sure it couldn't have been worse. With what she had seen of the galaxy, with what she knew about the universe that she could have done without, no matter how hard she tried, the service just didn't sit right with her. Elizabeth's family had never been very religious, but she found herself stumbling over the Lord's Prayer and fading into silence, in a quiet mix of shame and doubt. She couldn't look at the coffins. And when she had to, she couldn't stop her tears. Living, quite literally, in another world had helped to build faith in things she knew she couldn't depend on for real. The service brought her back down to earth and grounded her harshly. She felt heavy. Weighed down as if she'd never break free again.

Elizabeth did her duty, as did the rest of her family, and concentrated on trying to ease her nieces' pain. She was very aware that there was nothing she could say that would make the day any easier. She found herself thinking she was betraying Ruth by not being honest. The truth would shatter her. And it wouldn't ease her pain at all. It would just be words and a jumble of lies going back years, words to turn her world upside down. It didn't matter that she was really her mother. She had never been a mother to her. She had always been Aunt Elizabeth. Stating that she was Ruth's mother wouldn't be productive in the slightest. It wouldn't make her stop crying. It wouldn't help her grief. God, already she felt like a liar and she had been in her presence for only a few hours. What was a more permanent arrangement going to do to her? And, in the long run, to Ruth? If she could ever bring herself to tell her.

"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust…"

Marie clamped her hands over her mouth in an attempt not to make a sound, tears streaming from her eyes, sobs wracking her small frame. She fell to her knees, curled over in a tiny heap.

Elizabeth knelt silently beside her, glancing at Ruth for a moment. The girl's elder sister stared straight ahead, unseeing, silent tears escaping her. Elizabeth drew Marie into her arms and rocked her, murmuring unheard reassurances as the service drew to an end.

* * *

She knew the wake wasn't going to be one of those that turned into an evening of sharing treasured family memories and laughing at the past antics of those lost. It was a quiet affair, almost as if everyone was unsure of what to say to each other. Strangers matched with blood. 

"You read the letter?"

Elizabeth sat in the dining room of her eldest brother's house, at a table across from him, "Yes."

Christopher Weir narrowed his eyes, as if trying to anticipate her actions without a single word of reply.

She shook her head, sadly, "Don't look at me like that, Chris," she said softly.

"Will you do as Karrin wished?" he asked.

Elizabeth hesitated, but nodded, "…Yes."

"Does this mean we will see the girls as infrequently as we do you?"

Unnecessary anger flared in her and she almost snapped back at him. She sighed, "I have work, I have to work, you know that. I'm not going to leave them somewhere and carry on. They'll be with me. All the time."

"But you can't tell us where or how long you're going to be gone," her brother shot back.

She couldn't believe he was behaving in such a way, "Is this really the time for this? Its classified, you know I can't tell you. I'm stationed somewhere and I can support Ruth and Marie, isn't that enough? Its what Karrin and James wanted. This isn't easy for me, in regard to work or otherwise. I'm honouring their wishes, its the least I can do, and if we aren't around very much then it's the price that has to be paid. If I could keep them with you and still do my duty to the girls, then I would, but its impossible."

Christopher reached for her hand across the table, almost offended when she snatched her hand away, shaking, "Lizzie… Come on, Elizabeth, you know I meant no offence. You're the youngest and I'm sorry, but that means we still worry, and you can't escape that."

"I'm capable, surely I've proved that to you in my lifetime."

He was silent and didn't reply with what he would have liked to say.

Elizabeth saw his response in his eyes with no need for words, "I did what I thought was right for Ruth," she kept her voice low, "call me irresponsible, call me whatever you like, but you will not convince me to regret ensuring she got what I couldn't give her."

"You can take care of the girls and of yourself?" he knew her well enough to know she was apt to give up everything for those she loved and forget about herself.

"Its going to be difficult. And its going to be more awkward and challenging than you'll ever know, but I'm not leaving them here when I go back."

Christopher studied her, "…Answer me honestly. It took you over two weeks to get back from wherever you were. And more than a week for the letters to reach you. Will we ever see you again, or are you going to vanish again? Are our nieces going to be safe?"

She stared at the surface of the table, trying to compose herself. She looked back up at him, determination in her gaze, "I can't say when we'll be back. But we will be. And they'll be as safe as I can ensure. They'll be loved by more than me alone and I would give my life for them. Is that a satisfactory answer?"

"…You don't have to prove yourself to me," he replied, "I only ever want to make sure you're safe and happy. Big brother's prerogative. Surely you understand that by now," he tried a sad smile.

"…Honestly? I'm grateful the three of you haven't pulled some kind of three prong attack."

"I volunteered," Christopher admitted.

Elizabeth tilted her head, "…The girls do know they're going with me?"

He nodded, "Yes. But they don't know where."

"I've got another two days before I have to head back with them. I have some official business to sort out, and I know I'll need to get new things for Ruth and Marie before we leave. I'm sorry, but we have to leave tomorrow morning."

"I know," he answered, "The things the girls have here are packed, save for clothes for tomorrow and what they need for today." He reached for her hand again, "Come home again soon, Elizabeth."

She tried to nod, but found herself gritting her teeth together to stop herself from crying again. It was when her brother sniffed that she realised he had already lost the battle. She gripped his hand tightly as they remained silent in their grief.

"Aunt Lizzie?"

Elizabeth looked back to see Marie at the door to the room, still dressed in black, the colour making her look more washed out and fragile than she already was, "Marie," she held out her arms, "Come here."

The dark haired child ran into her aunt's embrace and seemed to burrow into her, trying to get as close as she could.

She looked up from her niece to see her mother and Ruth standing in the doorway. Ruth met her gaze for a moment, then seemed to look straight past her, eyes glazed over. She looked utterly lost. Elizabeth's mother didn't look much better, already dark circles under her eyes made worse by trails of mascara. She held out a hand to them both, "Ruth? Mom?"

Ruth silently, and slowly, made her way across the room and allowed herself to be folded into her aunt's arms.

Laura Weir took in the scene for a couple of seconds, then nodded, and turned away, back into the main room.

Elizabeth rested her head on top of her nieces' and closed her eyes. She only opened them when she heard another of her brothers' voice.

"You'll do good, Elizabeth. You'll make Karrin proud," Nathan said, focused for a moment, before he seemed to slip back into the lost state of the rest of the family. He ran a hand through his hair and let the door to the kitchen swing shut behind him, catching it before it slammed.

She gazed down at the children in her arms, trying to quell the near terror at failure within her. She could only hope she knew what she was doing. And hope it would be enough.


	3. Chapter 3

She had spent the previous day shopping. Buying everything she thought two little girls would ever need or miss when ripped from their homes. She was starting to have doubts again. Elizabeth knew she was doing the right thing, but for who? For herself, so she wouldn't feel guilty at ignoring her sister's wishes? Or was she really doing the right thing for her nieces at all? They had already lost their parents, and she was about to drag them away so they lost absolutely everything else. Friends, other family, their home. Even stupid little things like the comfort and familiarity of their own bedrooms. She was taking them to a cold, alien, city, where there wouldn't even be another child to talk to. She was giving them the best opportunity any child could wish for, yet destroying them at the same time. She was turning their world upside down. Almost literally.

Elizabeth glanced up at her rear-view mirror. It was finally light outside, and Marie and Ruth sat slumped together in the back of the car she had rented. Both, it seemed, fast asleep. They had started out before dawn to get to the SGC early. She still hadn't told them where she was taking them. All she had said was 'home'. They didn't know 'home' to her was an ocean world and a Ancient city. Marie was young enough to find it exciting. Ruth was old enough to resent her for lying and tearing them away from Earth. Elizabeth was simply terrified. She loved the girls. She loved them. And she was about to change them forever in a way that could never be undone. Burden them with her secrets and force the silence of lies into every relationship they would ever have.

Perhaps they'll think she's the crazy aunt. The one they'll have to humour with smiles and nod in all the right places. Maybe until they see she wasn't lying or going a little insane she will lose them for a while. Elizabeth hated her time spent on the Daedalus. Spending the time with two children, cooped up and hyperactive with nowhere to be kids again, wasn't her idea of fun. Though she told herself she was a terrible person for having such a thought, for a moment she hoped their grief would keep them quiet and manageable. Her grief had been quiet and anything but manageable. With nowhere to go and days to spend staring at the same grey walls, she hoped to whatever god existed that she could cope. That she wouldn't break and they wouldn't suddenly shatter on her.

She actually had no idea what she was doing. She had given up Ruth for a reason other than the fear that she couldn't give the girl the life she deserved. Elizabeth had no idea how to be a mother. It scared her more than anything she had ever faced, including her time in Atlantis. She had loved Ruth from the moment she had set eyes on her and had cried more than she thought she ever would when she effectively gave her up, but she had no idea what that love would drive her to do. It had scared her. It had had complete control of her. And she never liked to give up control. Atlantis had reintroduced that feeling of helplessness, and, slowly, she was learning to reclaim control.

She had the horrible feeling that the two innocent girls in the backseat of her car were going to tear that control right from her again.

* * *

Colonel Caldwell happened to be the first person she recognised that she happened across back at the SGC. Elizabeth vaguely remembered quite a few of the staff from her brief time working there, but Caldwell was the first person she saw whom she could actually claim to know. She couldn't exactly claim he was a friend, but they had learnt to tolerate each other and work together with as little conflict as possible. On their good days. Whether they had their differences or not, she wasn't ecstatic that he was the first person she saw who knew her as well. Especially considering he had no idea she was about to bring two young girls back to Atlantis with her. On his ship. Well, supposedly 'his'.

Caldwell nearly stopped dead when he saw her, Marie fast asleep in her arms and Ruth pacing sullenly along beside her, "I wasn't aware you had children, Doctor."

Elizabeth wasn't quite sure how to respond. 'I don't' was the immediate and obvious answer she would have used. However, now it wasn't entirely true. Her nieces had effectively become her children. Whether they would truly be thought of as her daughters, or whether she thought of them as such, the answer she nearly snapped would have sounded like she was disowning them. Certainly not something she wanted to do, and certainly not something for either of them to hear.

"These are my nieces," she responded, "Ruth and Marie, my late sister's daughters. They're coming home with me," she hoped he would catch the tone of her voice and not reply with any statements involving space travel and crystal cities.

The Colonel looked almost startled for a moment, "Your nieces are returning with us?"

"I am their guardian and they are my responsibility. The General is aware of the situation," Elizabeth glanced down at Ruth, "Ruth, this is Colonel Caldwell, he's going to be travelling with us. Actually, he's in charge of seeing that everyone gets to their destination safely."

Ruth hesitated for a second, but she stepped forward and offered her hand politely, "Nice to meet you."

Caldwell shook her hand and nodded, "You too, miss."

"Excuse me," Elizabeth bobbed her head and quickly continued down the corridor, Ruth trailing behind.

"…Why are we on a military base, Aunt Lizzie?" she asked.

"Yeah, why are there soldiers everywhere?" Marie questioned, suddenly wide awake.

Elizabeth suspected her young niece had been awake all along and just wanted to be carried. Even if she was a little old for it. She set Marie down on the ground and walked between the girls, "Because this is the…organisation I work for, and this is where we leave for your new home. This base is run by the Air Force, hence the officers."

"Mommy always said you travelled the world…" Marie's voice trailed off as she finished and she looked as if she might cry at her own mention of her lost mother.

"…I may not have been entirely truthful with your Mom…"

"Mommy said it was bad to lie."

She shivered, uncomfortable. Yes, she had lied, the lie had been forced on her. Yes it was bad to lie, especially in a child's eyes. It would always be 'bad' to be less than honest in the eyes of a child of Marie's age.

"Where are we going?" Ruth interrupted.

Elizabeth silently thanked the girl for her curiosity, "That's what I have to tell you," she led them into the briefing room, where General Landry and Colonel Carter already sat at the long table, "Ruth, Marie, this is General Landry, he's in charge here, and Colonel Carter, she's a member of the leading unit." She pulled two of the chairs from the table, "Sit down please, girls."

Her nieces exchanged a confused glance and obediently sat down.

She took a seat opposite them, beside Sam.

"Now girls," Landry began, "What we have to tell you, you have to keep a secret. You can't tell anybody, not even your family.

Marie narrowed her dark eyes, "Not even Grandma?" she made it sound as if it would be some great betrayal.

"Not even your Grandma," Sam chimed in.

Ruth frowned, "…Aunt Lizzie doesn't travel the world, does she? That's why she's away for so long and we never got to see her."

"Marie, Ruth, you have to promise never to tell anyone about what we have to say. Anyone, ever," Elizabeth stated, "As long as you live. Not your friends, not Uncle Chris, not Grandma, nobody. If you were grown-up, you would have to sign a form to make your promise, but we can't have you sign it. We need your word and we need you to be honest and never, ever, break your promise."

"…But lying is bad…" Marie whispered, shocked.

Sam tried a smile, "This isn't a lie. Its just…keeping a secret. Can you do that?"

"A secret we can never tell anyone we know? Even people we love?" Ruth countered.

"A secret that makes you special. It gives you chances that hardly anyone in this world will ever have. Means you see things few people ever will. But you have to promise never to tell unless we give you permission."

Ruth stared across at Elizabeth, "I promise," she said.

Marie glanced at her sister, then back at Sam, briefly at Landry and finally nodded, "…I promise…" she said, quietly.

Elizabeth took a deep breath, "…I don't live in the United States. I don't even live on this planet. I live in a city in another galaxy, that we got to using a device called a Stargate."

Ruth almost laughed. A smile appeared on her face and swiftly vanished when she saw her aunt seemed deadly serious. She tucked stray strands of wavy hair behind her ears and stared at the table, embarrassed.

"You've both learnt about the solar system in school. That's just our galaxy, and just some of the planets in our system. That's just a start. There are other peoples, other animals, on other planets, many, many forms of life. It sounds like science fiction from the TV, but its all real, I promise you," she continued.

Marie stared, "Aliens are real?"

Elizabeth nodded, "Yes. Often they look, and are very like, us. Two of my friends back in Atlantis, that's the name of the city, are aliens. But they're basically human, like us."

"Atlantis? We studied that myth in history," Ruth said.

She smiled, "Well, its real. As are a lot of other mythological stories."

"We're going to live on an alien planet?" Marie asked.

"Yes," Elizabeth nodded, "In another galaxy. …I'm the leader of the city."

Ruth's eyes widened, "…I get why you couldn't tell Grandma. She'd be so proud she'd tell the world."

Marie looked to Landry, "Aunt Lizzie rules an alien city?"

He smiled, "Yes, she does."

"Woah!"

"…Mom would've loved to see it…" Ruth said softly.

The sadness instantly returned to Marie's eyes and she stared down at the table, blinking.

"…Your Mom would have loved that you will get to see it. That you'll get to live there and be taught by the world's experts in every field," Elizabeth replied, keeping her voice gentle.

"…We'll still have school?" Marie tilted her head.

"Yes, but it won't be like regular school. When you're older, you'll get to choose what you study and really specialise in it, even things never taught here on Earth. Whatever you want to study and work with, even if its from another galaxy," Sam explained.

"We'll always be different," Ruth caught on.

"Yes, your education will be different, and mean more opportunities for you. You wouldn't have to necessarily work in the United States, or even on this planet," Landry added.

"We wont see our family or our friends for a long time, will we?" Marie mumbled.

"…No," Elizabeth shook her head, "We can still come back here though, it just takes time and we won't always have the option to go when we want. The people in Atlantis are close…you're not going to be alone, you understand? I'll be there whenever you need me and I know many others will be too." She knew the 'whenever you need me' part was likely going to become a lie, but she had to sell the plan to them. It wasn't as if they had a choice anyway, but she needed to reassure them too.

"Will that man we saw when you last came home be there?" she asked.

"…John?" Ruth frowned, trying to remember, "He was in the Air Force…I think…"

"Yes, he will. We work together often," Elizabeth nodded. She wasn't sure whether the girls had caught on to how close she was to John and she really didn't want to spring that kind of information on them. In a way, she hoped they hadn't realised, for she didn't want to have to explain it to the General. If he didn't already know from Caldwell. It was just then that the balance she was going to have to strike between reality and protecting her nieces from it hit her. It was their ages. As she had thought before, Marie was young enough to be dangerously naïve and blinded by ideals, whereas Ruth was old enough to handle, and to want to know, the truth. About everything.

"…So…" the girl began.

"We're going to live in another galaxy," Marie finished for her sister, smiling.

Both girls gazed across at her, curiosity clear in their eyes. One more cautious than the other, one clearly very excited.

"Yes," Elizabeth smiled slightly, "Yes, you are."


	4. Chapter 4

Two weeks into the trip back to Atlantis, Elizabeth found herself sinking further and further into a depressed state. Perhaps it wasn't so much that she felt constantly, devastatingly, upset, because she was able to keep her grief at bay for most of the time. She just felt…absent. Numb. Like she was walking around on autopilot, as if there was some invisible barrier between her and the world. She spoke, she worked, she smiled, she felt none of it. Sometimes her grief came rushing back with a crippling pain, but most often she found herself scared to death. Elizabeth was acting. She knew she had to put on a brave face for the girls, because she was sure whatever she felt was nothing compared to their loss. Sometimes she couldn't feel anything. Sometimes everything hurt like hell. She just couldn't find a good medium. She wondered if everything would sort itself out once she got back to Atlantis. Maybe it was the anticipation, the worry of what would happen, how things would be, once they got there. Maybe she just needed to get back there and start sorting the lives of her new charges out to get settled again.

Elizabeth wasn't sleeping. She knew she had the option of sedatives, which she had resorted to before, but she refused to consider taking them again. She didn't want to know she would have to be chemically knocked out every time she needed a rest. There was a fine line between taking the occasional sleeping pill to get a good night's sleep and becoming dependant on them to get any sleep. She had come close to that line before…and she didn't want to tread so near to it again.

Two weeks into the journey, she found herself in the commissary of the Daedalus at some god forsaken time in the morning, staring out into the blackness of space as the stars streaked by. Juggling a half empty coffee cup between her hands and slouched in her seat, Elizabeth sighed let her mind wander back to Atlantis as it so often did. It stunned her a little how often she thought of Atlantis, and thought of it as home, not Earth. It just seemed that every time she returned to Earth, more ties with 'home' were cut.

"Aunt Lizzie?"

Elizabeth sat up straight and turned to glance behind her, "Ruth…what're you doing up at this time?"

Ruth slowly wandered across the room to meet her, "Can't sleep," she dragged out a chair beside her aunt and sat down, knees drawn to her chest.

"Does Marie know you're-"

"No," she shook her head, "She's still asleep. Don't know how she can sleep wrapped up in her blanket like that though," she smiled slightly.

"Maybe it's the same theory as why cats like sleeping in boxes. Maybe its comforting, some form of protection," Elizabeth replied.

Ruth shifted her chair closer and leant against her, sighing.

She wrapped an arm around her and rested her head on hers, "…I'm sorry, Ruth…"

"For what?"

"For taking you away from everything you know."

Ruth dragged several strands of wavy dark hair back behind her ear, trying a shrug, "…Means I get to see things people don't even know exist. Means I know what's out there… I guess… I guess its true when people say you can't have everything…" she paused, "…But Mom would've been pleased…I hope…and I hope she'll be proud…of me…"

Elizabeth hugged her closer, "Of course she will. Your Mom has always been proud of you…"

Just for that moment, she wished the girl beside her knew she meant herself and not Karrin.

* * *

Elizabeth wasn't looking forward to walking into the Atlantis command centre with two children with her. For a start, John had no idea she would be bringing her nieces back with her, nor did anyone else. She was already anticipating all the comments she suspected would be made about how inappropriate it was to have children in Atlantis. At the moment, her only argument was that they had had Athosian children living in Atlantis. …Though that had often caused a lot of trouble. To hell with it. As long as she didn't get overly defensive about it, she could deal with any comments. Two of the female personnel stationed in Atlantis were pregnant, due in the next six months, so any individuals who were outspoken on the subject of kids in the city were to be dealt with swiftly, not just for her nieces' sakes. 

As soon as she set foot back in the city she was so thankful for the sense of relief that flooded her that she almost laughed. Elizabeth smiled slightly as she had to nudge Ruth along when the girl stopped and stared at the sights around her, eyes wide. She gripped Marie's hand in case she got any ideas about running headlong into the city or off the edge of the pier into the water. She had heard enough stories from Karrin and James about her youngest niece's escapades to know to be careful.

"You weren't kidding…" Ruth uttered.

"The spaceship wasn't enough?" Elizabeth smiled.

"…It could've been a plane with blacked out windows…"

"You're a very cynical young woman," she teased.

"Did you believe all this when they told you, Aunt Lizzie?" Marie asked.

"…No," she admitted.

"You get to run this place? Order everyone around?"

Elizabeth tried a stern face, "It isn't that simple…"

"But you get to tell everyone what to do, right?" Marie continued.

"…Most of them…yes…"

"Cool!"

She decided not to mention how often she had to fight to get people to listen to her and that leadership really wasn't as exciting as it sounded. That power wasn't all it was said to be once you actually had it. But Marie was still a little girl, and if she had plans for world domination, then so be it. There wasn't much she could take over with stuffed animals as her henchmen.

"…So…we live here now? Until we're grown up?" Ruth asked.

"And when you're adults, if you want to stay," Elizabeth answered. She silenced the part of her that added 'and if the city's still here'. Once inside the city, she headed straight for the command centre. She knew she would have to go back later to reclaim all her, and the girls', belongings, but, for now, all cargo was just being unloaded. As it was, she ended up in the 'Gate room and decided against heading straight for her office. Her nieces were going to discover she was a workaholic anyway – she didn't want to give them that impression as soon as she introduced them to the city.

"Doctor Weir," Teyla caught sight of her and smiled, looking down at her from the railings of the command centre. She hid her shock at seeing two young children with her very well, "Welcome back."

"Thank you Teyla," Elizabeth nodded and returned the smile, a little hesitant.

"Elizabeth," John was suddenly standing beside Teyla, hiding his shock atrociously. He frowned, "Welcome home," his eyes widened as he recognised the girls, "…Ruth, Marie…" he greeted. He smiled, "Welcome to Atlantis," he wasn't quite able to prevent his sudden confusion from seeping into his voice. He pushed off the railings and headed down to the 'Gate room, Teyla close behind him.

"Ruth, Marie," Elizabeth began as her friends approached, "This is Teyla Emmagan," she smiled as Marie politely held her hand out to her, "And John Sheppard, if you remember, you met a couple of years ago."

"It is good to meet you, Miss…" Teyla glanced at Elizabeth, unsure whether to continue with 'Weir' or not.

"Moran," Marie supplied the answer, "The regular joke is moron," she shrugged.

"But you're smart," John countered.

She shrugged, "Maybe that's why its funny? I don't know."

"Teyla, John, meet my nieces, Marie and Ruth," Elizabeth smiled slightly, "They're going to be living in Atlantis from now on."

"Its nice to meet you," Ruth bobbed her head.

"How do you know I'm smart?" Marie demanded of John.

He looked taken aback for a moment, "So says your Aunt Elizabeth."

She looked up at her, "You think I'm smart?"

"I know you're smart," Elizabeth replied.

Ruth seemed to be studying Teyla, head tilted, "…Are you…?" she realised how rude she was being and quickly stopped talking, staring down at the floor, ashamed.

Teyla smiled, trying to put the girl at ease, "…I am…not from Earth, if that was your question. I am Athosian, my people were the first yours met in this galaxy. Or so I believe."

"You look human," Marie stated.

Now Teyla laughed, "I suppose I am, on most biological levels. There are several differences though."

"What do you girls think of the place so far?" John tried to steer the conversation in another direction.

"Its shiny," Marie replied, grinning.

John glanced at Elizabeth, "A girl after my own heart."

Ruth gazed around her, "…It seems…peaceful."

"Wait 'til you've been here a few days," he smiled.

"Can you see the ocean from every window?" the youngest child asked.

Another glance between John and Elizabeth, especially the uneasy expression on the latter's face, and Teyla supplied another bright smile, "I am uncertain. I do know you can see the ocean from most of the windows on the level above us. Would you girls like to come and see?"

"Yeah!" Marie yelped.

Ruth nodded, "Okay." She paused, "Can we go, Aunt Lizzie?"

"Of course," Elizabeth nodded.

Teyla headed off towards the stairs leading to the command centre, the girls following her on either side. The two left in the 'Gate room could already hear them shooting questions at their new temporary, alien, minder.

"Well…that went well…" Elizabeth let out a slow breath.

"First introduction to an alien race. I'd say that went very well," John answered. He didn't ask the question she knew he would ask. Asking it would have been the first step toward making the flow of questions behind it seem like an interrogation. She had been through enough in the past few weeks. All he knew for certain was that she hadn't been expecting to return to Atlantis with two young girls in tow. If she had even suspected that would have been the case…then she would have said…something…anything…to him. So he liked to believe.

Elizabeth wandered to the far side of the room to keep quiet, away from the sudden commotion in the room as the crew of the Daedalus entered, most of them hauling cargo. She kept her voice low, "…In her will, Karrin stated she wanted me to take care of her daughters. She asked me not to hand them over to my brothers, because one day she wanted…" she sighed, "…She wanted Ruth to know…"

"That you're her real mother," John finished for her.

She nodded silently and looked away, running a hand through her hair.

He almost reached for her, before he remembered where they were. People in the city might have their suspicions about them, but nobody knew anything for sure. Though he knew she needed his support, what she didn't need was anyone to have concrete evidence about their relationship to throw at her.

"We'll keep them safe, Elizabeth," he assured her.

Elizabeth nodded again, almost just to herself, and looked back up at him, "…I know we will. But for how long? And whether they're safe or not, who do they have to talk to here? Who can they turn to? They're the only children here, how are they going to make proper friends? I love them, John, but what…" she trailed off, finishing in a hushed whisper, "…what if they grow to hate me when they realise what I've done…?"

"You haven't done anything wrong," he insisted, "you've done what your sister wanted and you've given those kids the opportunity of a lifetime."

She gazed back at him through tired eyes, "…Then why do I feel guilty?"


	5. Chapter 5

The evening of Marie and Ruth's first day in Atlantis found Elizabeth on the floor of her nieces' new quarters, files littered around her, tablet computer on her knees. She had left John technically 'in charge' of the city for the remainder of the day, whilst she set about finding suitable living quarters for the girls and making sure they settled in as well as they could for their first night.

She had been all for giving up her quarters and moving wherever there she could live beside whatever quarters she could find for Ruth and Marie. It hadn't come down to that in the end, and it would've been a lot of trouble in the long run, but two of the personnel who had lived in the same block as her had decided to 'retire' as it were, from the Atlantis mission. One had been seriously injured and the other couldn't stand to be parted from her when she was sent back to Earth for her long recovery. Though the circumstances weren't exactly wonderful, it did mean that there were quarters suitable for two available a few doors down from Elizabeth. She had asked the girls if they wanted to each have their own quarters or if they wanted to stay together, but both had said they didn't want to be parted. At least, not now. Elizabeth thought things might change in a few years, when Ruth was to be in her mid teens, and if they were still in Atlantis then, but, for now, everything was fine by her. She was close enough to them to sort out any problems and to keep an eye on them.

At the moment, Ruth was fixated by the view of the ocean and Marie was trying to arrange the few stuffed animals she had been able to bring on her bed. Their quarters looked somewhat like a hotel room, even felt like it, to Elizabeth – the essentials in the room, beds close together, identical bedside cabinets, but little to nothing else present. Elizabeth suspected that, at some point, the beds might be moved to opposite ends of their quarters for each to have their own space, but she was aware of the comfort her nieces drew from each other's presence for the moment, and had no desire to split them up.

She was seated in their main living area, the edge of Marie's bed just visible round the corner, the twitch of the blankets on the bed telling her that her youngest charge was still happily sorting her stuffed animals on the pillows. Elizabeth glanced behind her to see Ruth still at the window, gazing out across the ocean, blinking into the sunset.

"Is the sea always this calm?" Ruth asked.

"Most of the time. We have storms, but if they get really bad, we shield the city from the worse of it," her aunt replied.

"Shield?" Marie piped up. She bounced from the head of her bed to the end, then to the floor.

Elizabeth frowned and nearly made a comment about being more careful, but decided against it, "It means nothing can touch the city as long as its in use."

"Why don't you use it all the time?" Ruth wandered from the window to sit on the edge of the ring of files.

"Because we don't have enough power to keep it on all the time. We have other things we need to run and not enough…well, batteries, I guess," she explained.

"Why don't you buy more?" Marie questioned.

Elizabeth smiled, "Its not that simple. We have to find them and then we can use them if we're lucky."

"Find them? What happens if you run out and can't find more?"

"They hold a lot of power, enough for years and years. They're thousands of years old and scattered across this galaxy. So…like I said, we have to go out and find them."

"…They're not going to give out any time soon, right?" Ruth frowned.

She shook her head, "Not that we know of. If they were, we'd find somewhere safe to go until we were sure everything was okay here," she failed to mention that if the city died, she probably would too, trying to save it. There were some things little girls just didn't need to know.

"Teyla said her ancestors lived here thousands of years ago."

Elizabeth nodded, "A race of people we call the Ancients lived here, this is their city. They left us clues on how to find it so we could claim it back for them one day."

"Are they coming back?" Marie shuffled toward her aunt and sister.

"…We…don't think so. They…" she wasn't quite sure how to explain it, "…They found a way to become…spirits, of a sort. They're very powerful. They watch what happens in many galaxies, but they can't come back here or change anything we do wrong."

"They died?" Ruth said softly.

"…No…they…found a way to leave their bodies and remain alive as energy. They call it Ascension."

"Can we do it?" Marie jumped over the files and nearly landed on Elizabeth.

"No," she shook her head and hugged Marie tight to her to steady them, "Some people have been known to do it…but they were chosen by the Ancients and had to make great sacrifices."

"…So…they saw Mom and Dad…and they…just let it happen…" Ruth whispered.

Her little sister looked up at Elizabeth, "…I heard Grandma say once that if we have a ben…ban…"

"Benevolent," Ruth interrupted, "If we have a benevolent god, why does he let bad things happen? If these Ancients see everything and everything bad that happens, why do they let it?"

Elizabeth frowned, concerned. She certainly hadn't meant to get into a religious or ethical debate, and especially not with the girls, "Come here," she dropped her tablet computer to the floor with little regard for its value and held out her arm to Ruth, shoving aside the files. The girl shuffled closer and she wrapped her arm round her, "…What happened to your Mom and Dad…was a terrible accident. And I know, trust me, I know how much you're hurting right now. Whether you believe in god or in any other power is your decision, and none of us know for sure what really goes on in this life. We just have to make the best of it that we can, even when awful things happen…and even though it sometimes seems it, it doesn't happen to us alone…everyone suffers…and whether that means there's a higher power or not, we'll never know…" she paused, "…The Ancients weren't, and aren't, gods. They just have a lot of power and we know they exist for sure. That doesn't mean anyone should have any more faith or distrust in them than in anything or anyone else. Nothing and nobody could build a perfect world that would be considered perfect by everyone…not even whatever god or power you choose to believe in."

"What do you believe in, Aunt Lizzie?" Marie asked softly.

She sighed deeply, "…I don't know, Marie…"

Ruth rested her head against her shoulder and closed her eyes.

"I suppose…I believe in people. Because they're who're going to come through for you when it matters," Elizabeth was about to continue, when a knock on the door made her look up, "Yes?"

"We…wondered if you could do with a hand," John spoke up for the group at the door, comprised of himself, Teyla, Ronon and McKay.

Marie could only stare at Ronon. She didn't think she'd ever seen anyone so tall in her life. Well, maybe that was an exaggeration, "…Is he…" her gazed flickered between him and Teyla, whom she asked the question of.

Teyla nearly laughed, "Yes, he is."

"Bit dark in here, isn't it?" Rodney commented.

John strolled through the door, the others behind him. He frowned as the lights flicked on, "…Sorry. Think that was me."

Ruth's eyes widened, "…And are you-"

"No," now Teyla did laugh, "He is not," she frowned, "I thought you knew each other, Colonel?"

"We do!" John feigned offence, "And to think," he teased, "I thought I seemed as human as the next guy."

"That's what you think," Rodney shot at him.

Marie clambered to her feet and jumped the files again, "How'd you do that thing with the lights?" she asked of John.

"I…er…thought about it…"

Ruth stood up and moved to stand beside her sister, "I'm Ruth," she greeted McKay and Ronon, "This is my little sister, Marie."

Ronon glanced at Elizabeth, wondering, for a brief moment, if she had a horde of children back on Earth she had told nobody about, "Ronon Dex," he answered.

"Rodney McKay," Rodney replied, "Doctor Mckay."

"Like a medical doctor?" Ruth wasn't so fond of them.

"Of physics."

"Oh. We do…we did…that at school."

"If I think about it, can I turn the lights off?" Marie was still staring at John.

"I…don't know…" he responded, honestly, "…Why don't you try it?" he had no way of knowing whether Marie had the gene. Just because Elizabeth didn't, it didn't mean nobody else in her family did.

Elizabeth shot him a warning glance, worried. She got to her feet, as if to grab her niece if she tried anything.

Marie closed her eyes and concentrated. Nothing, "Aw…"

The room suddenly plunged into the dull light of the evening and all eyes were on Marie.

"Did you…" Elizabeth started.

The lights flicked back on again, "No…" Ruth shook her head, "That wasn't her."

"I didn't tell them to come back on…" the girl mumbled, confused.

"…It was me…" her sister uttered, stunned.

John clapped, unsure how to react, "Well done, Ruth."

"She has the Ancestor gene," Ronon stated.

"Well, the more the merrier," Rodney commented.

Ruth whirled round to face Elizabeth, almost afraid.

"It means you can use some of the technology here that others of us can't," she explained, "its not dangerous. You just…might have to be a little more careful…" she tried a smile, "It's a good thing, Ruth, trust me," she was trying to convince herself of that fact at the same time.

"Does it mean I'm…alien…?" she asked in a hushed whisper.

Elizabeth shook her head, "No, no. You just have an active gene that some of us don't. Doctors can trigger it in some people even if its not natural. You…have a special ability that'll be useful to you. And to us."

"Oh…" she didn't sound convinced.

"No fair! I want it!" Marie exclaimed.

"Maybe when you're older," McKay quipped. Perhaps when she was older she really could have the treatment to see if they could get the gene to activate in her, "I don't know about you guys, but I'm starving…"

"Perhaps we should go eat…" Teyla agreed.

"I'm all for that," Ronon nodded.

"Can I get a piggyback?" Marie asked him.

He frowned, "A…piggy…what?"

"I'll show you," John answered, "Marie, hop?"

The girl jumped and climbed onto his back, "See?"

"Your turn next time," he threatened, grinning at Ronon.

"Ruth? You want to get some food?" Elizabeth asked.

"…Sure…"

"To the commissary we go," Rodney led the way.

Elizabeth mouthed a silent 'thank you' to John as Marie giggled and reached out with one hand to grab at Ronon's dreadlocks, to his even greater confusion. As they left the room, she noticed Ruth was hesitating, "…Ruth?" she called.

"…I'm different already…" the girl said quietly, hiding her eyes.

She reached for her hand, "No, you're not," she insisted, "You're gifted," she assured her, "One day you'll be very thankful and you'll be able to do more than flick the lights on and off. It's a blessing. You see John has the gene and he's not any different is he?"

"…No…"

"We'll explain everything to you, I promise," Elizabeth knew that was what she needed to get her to understand. She knew from what Karrin used to say that Ruth was easily frustrated when she couldn't get all the information available to her. There was no use in censoring what she found out, it would only concern her further.

Ruth took her hand, "…Okay…"

"Let's catch up with the others," Elizabeth gave her a little tug and a smile to try and cajole her on her way, at the same instant repeating to herself that everything was going to be fine. It had to be.

-

Later that evening, Elizabeth couldn't bring herself to leave her nieces. A first night in a different home, in a different country, was bad enough, but a first night in a different galaxy with the concepts of the universe thrown upside down? She forced herself to leave and stood outside their quarters, one hand on the multi-hued glass of the door, as if she could touch them through it.

"Elizabeth?"

She didn't jump at the sound of his voice, "John."

"Are they asleep?"

"I don't know…"

"They're great kids…" John smiled.

"I know…" she smiled gently.

He closed the distance between them and kissed her, "…I missed you…"

Elizabeth rested her head against his, "I missed you too," she looked up at him, "…This changes everything…"

He nodded, "It does," he kissed her again, "But some things are constant."

"…John, I-"

"I know," John wrapped his arms around her, "I know."

She allowed herself to rest against him, collapsing a little, for a long moment, "They have to be my first devotion."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

Elizabeth held close to him for a moment longer, before stepping away.

"You're not alone, you understand?" he said softly, "We're all here. All of us, whenever you need us. Me especially."

"Thank you…" she tried to stop herself, but couldn't resist brushing her lips against his a final time.

"Night, Elizabeth," John slowly headed back down the corridor.

"Goodnight, John…" she watched him go.

Though she had envisioned it the other way round, the early hours of the morning found Elizabeth tip-toeing into her nieces' room to sleep in their bed, the two girls already both in Marie's bed, stuffed animals littered between the blankets and pillows. Both girls snuggled closer to her as she wrapped her arms around them as if she could protect them. She drifted to sleep as dawn crept through the windows.


	6. Chapter 6

After snatching barely four hours sleep, Elizabeth left her nieces' room whilst they were still sleeping. A quick shower later, she was in the command centre, and feeling rather out of sorts as she requested that somebody be posted outside the girls' room, so that when they woke she could be found, or they could be brought to her. She felt bad leaving them – the last thing she wanted was for them to wake and panic in unfamiliar surroundings, but she had to deal with the running of the city. And, that morning, that was the more pressing matter. She had been away for over a month. She had a lot to catch up on.

Elizabeth was vaguely surprised to see John seated at her desk when she walked into her office, and smiled when he jumped up and immediately offered her seat back to her. He took the seat opposite, whilst she reclaimed her chair, "Morning."

"Morning," he answered. He tilted his head, "How're the girls?"

She ran a hand through hair that was still soaking wet and falling in bedraggled curls to her shoulders, "They got more sleep than I did, I suspect," she replied.

"Understandable…" John paused, "…You might want to explain to a few people who they are, before the wrong rumours start up. I've already been asked at least five times this morning."

She nodded, "Thank you," she gazed through the glass walls of her office for a long moment, "…So…what did I miss?"

He smirked and kicked his feet up onto her desk, looking rather proud of himself, "City's still standing."

Elizabeth pretended to shove his feet right back off her desk, half-heartedly, with a mock frown to match, "And…?"

"Well…expect an Athosian party to petition you in the next few days."

"What?"

"Some of them want to leave, split off from the main group. They tried to discuss the matter with me and I asked them to wait until you returned," John explained, "They've been speaking to Teyla too, who's been trying to convince them to stay…"

"Why do they want to leave?" she asked.

He grimaced and shook his head, "They think we're making questionable alliances. The mainland is a target just as much as Atlantis is, and they don't have a shield."

"…Neither do we, ninety percent of the time…" Elizabeth mumbled.

"It all comes down to – they're grateful for our help and consider us to be great friends, but some of them just want to leave. They don't agree with our way of doing things and they don't want to 'pay the price' for it, as they say."

She sighed, "I suppose I won't be able to change their minds?"

"They seem pretty set on it…" John answered.

"Wonderful…"

"They just want to use the Stargate to get out of here."

"I can't deny them that," her shoulders slumped, "Next?"

"McKay blew up one of the labs. We're still putting it back together. Trying to," he said.

"That's routine," Elizabeth tried to joke, "May I ask what he did this time?"

He waved a hand and shook his head, "It was a long, complicated, garbled and boring answer. The lab is black right now, but should be in working order again in a few days."

"Right…"

"…Teyla's having nightmares again…nearly every night…" John reluctantly informed her.

She frowned, "…How is she? And how…do you know? She's never seemed the sort to share such a thing…we usually have to drag any ailments out of her…"

"It's got to the stage where she doesn't want to sleep. And she's actually waking other people up with her screaming…"

"Oh god…"

"She's very reluctantly talking to Heightmeyer," John sighed.

"…At least that's a start… I'll find some time to talk to her."

"She seems quite taken with Marie and Ruth," he smiled slightly, "She's surprisingly good with kids. Impressed with Marie's curiosity."

"Maybe they could spend some time together. Perhaps it would help her, and help them adjust, I suppose…" Elizabeth nodded, "…Dare I ask if there's anything else?"

He winced, "There's a list. Its on the network, under your username."

"I'll take a look. I also have to find teachers for the girls today…"

"I know a lot of the people here have teaching qualifications," John assured her, "I'm sure they wouldn't object to taking the odd class. Especially with such small numbers."

She looked away from him for a moment, knowing what she was about to ask was a touchy subject with him. She almost considered not asking, but he really was the best man for the job. Especially if Ruth and Marie were to get to know him better, if all three of them were to be more permanent fixtures in her life. Or so Elizabeth hoped, very quietly and with no admittances dragged out, "…Would you consider teaching them math?"

He blinked several times, staring at her, a little stunned, "I…er…"

"I'm sorry. I wouldn't ask, but you really are the best person for the job. God, John, you can calculate faster than Rodney on most occasions, and make it look effortless. I understand if you don't want to but…I'd very much like for you to teach them."

"I…don't have a teaching qualification…"

"I know. You're still the best candidate," she replied quietly, "I don't want to force you into it. But I wouldn't ask if I didn't think you were capable."

John nodded, "…I'll do it…if only to save them from McKay."

She smiled slightly, "I was going to ask him to teach them physics…"

"God help them."

* * *

Marie gazed out the windows at the far end of their quarters, frowning, "Do you think its summer?" 

Ruth looked up from tying her shoelaces, "What?"

"Do you think its summer? Its really bright out there. No clouds."

She paused, "We don't even know if this planet has a summer…"

"Everywhere has a summer," Marie stated, ever the optimist.

"You never know," Ruth stood up, "Come on, let's go find Aunt Lizzie."

"Maybe she wants us to stay here," her little sister ran across the room to claim her watch from her bedside table, "I mean its-" she frowned at said watch, "…One in the morning? …Afternoon? Do you think its like home with time zones?"

"No idea," she shrugged, "Let's go."

Marie headed for the door and tentatively hit the release for it to open. On stepping outside, she stepped right back, and stepped on her sister's toes. She looked up at the stranger at their door, "Hello."

"Hi there. Doctor Weir asked me to take you two girls to her when you woke up," a blonde haired man with a slight accent smiled down at them.

"You mean Aunt Elizabeth?" Ruth asked.

"Yes…I suppose I do," he stood corrected.

"What do you do?" Marie questioned.

"I'm a historian. I study the cultures we find out here and see how they relate to those back on Earth," he explained. He smiled again, "Come on, we'd better get going before your aunt starts to worry."

The two girls obediently followed, one briefly wondering whether they had to lock their quarters. Or whether there was even a way to lock their quarters. Or if this galaxy even had a concept of locks.

* * *

"I have instructed children of school age in physics, Doctor Weir, and in chemistry on request, but I have no experience teaching linguistics…" Miko shyly trailed off and attempted to hide behind her laptop. 

"Your records say you have excellent qualifications in five languages," Elizabeth countered.

She nodded, "I am able to speak five languages. But is this not also true of yourself?"

"Yes, it is…but I don't believe I could find the time from organising the city to teach my nieces three languages. I also don't think it would be entirely appropriate for me to teach them myself – I would like them to have new teachers, as they would at school."

Miko blushed, "If it is what you wish, I would be honoured to teach your nieces."

Elizabeth smiled, "Doctor, I'm not giving you an order. Only if you can spare the time."

"What languages are they currently learning?"

"French and German, as far as I'm aware. Ruth, the elder, already knows some German, but Marie was due to begin learning in the next few months."

"…And you wish me to instruct them in a third language?" she asked.

"Yes, your own Japanese, if you don't mind. I'd like them to learn a language not comprised of the alphabet as they know it. If you start them on hiragana and basic grammar and inform me of their progress…" Elizabeth explained.

"Of course."

"If you let me know when you could spare the time, I can schedule some lessons."

Miko nodded, "I will let you know as soon as possible," she hesitated and looked most uncomfortable for a few seconds, "…Doctor Weir?"

"Yes?"

"…I should probably tell you…I have already heard some conversations concerning what they believe to be the…inappropriateness of having children in the city…there have already been some unkind words…and I would not want your nieces to hear-"

"It was to be expected, I'm afraid…" Elizabeth sighed, "I'll deal with it, Miko. Thank you for informing me."

"Doctor Weir?"

"Aunt Lizzie," Ruth greeted, as their guardian stepped back to let them into the small lab.

"Thank you for giving up your time, Doctor Black," she bobbed her head.

"Not a problem," he waved to the girls and left the room.

"Ruth, Marie, meet one of your new teachers, Doctor Kusanagi," Elizabeth said.

"It is a pleasure to meet you," Miko smiled at the girls.

"We have two physics teachers?" Ruth asked.

"Doctor McKay quizzed us on physics next door…he said he's going to be teaching us," Marie added.

"I will be continuing your studies in French and German," Miko answered, "and starting you on Japanese, if you have no objections."

It was Marie whose eyes lit up, "Wow! Really?"

"Do we have school every day?" her sister questioned.

"It depends on when everyone has the time for your lessons. You should have lessons most days, just not as structured as the schools back home," Elizabeth replied, "The days are a little different too."

"Do we get to eat five times a day or something?" the youngest chirped.

She laughed, "No, nothing as drastic as that," she started to shepherd the girls from the room, "Let's go meet a couple more of your teachers. Thank you, Doctor."

"You're welcome," Miko smiled.

"Bye bye," Marie said.

"Bye," Ruth followed suit.

Once they were out in the corridors of the city, Elizabeth glanced back at her nieces, "How would feel if John were to teach you math?"

"I thought Mr John flew planes," Marie frowned.

"He can fly planes and do math," Ruth nudged her, "…and turn lights on and off with his mind…"

Elizabeth then remembered she meant to take the girls to Carson for full check-ups. And to run more tests to see if Ruth really had the Ancient gene or if it had been a fluke. Perhaps Marie had the gene too, the impromptu test with the lights the previous evening had hardly been a sure test. She found herself wondering how strong the gene must have been in Ruth's father if she truly had been able to manipulate the lighting like she had. She sighed quietly – it had been a great while since she had spent any length of time thinking of Ruth's real father.

"Grandma said you might marry Mr John," Marie piped up.

Elizabeth stared, "Grandma said what?" her mother had only met John the once! Fair enough, she had walked in on them kissing, but she had never jumped to such conclusions if she had ever seen her and other partners in the same situation!

"She said he seemed like a nice young man," the girl carried on.

"Marie…" Ruth hissed, trying to signal her to shut up.

"Do you think you'll marry him?" she ignored her sister.

Any louder and she might as well have made it a public announcement. Elizabeth stopped and turned to face the girls, "…I'm sure Grandma's made a lot of comments like that about a lot of people…"

"She did say she thought the milkman was going to marry our neighbour…" Marie mused.

"Well then…"

Ruth narrowed her eyes, sensing the near embarrassment in her aunt's tone. Let alone the desperation to silence her little sister. Whether Elizabeth married anyone or not wasn't particularly high on her list of concerns at the moment. But she evidently wanted Marie silenced, so it meant something to her at least.

"Remember when she said you were going to marry Will?" Ruth reminded her.

Marie wrinkled her nose, "I'm not marrying Will."

"John and I run Atlantis together. We're very good friends," Elizabeth continued on down the corridor. She glanced around, making sure nobody was likely to hear her, "…and I care for him very much," she said quietly, "He's a good friend," she repeated. She laughed, trying to make it a joke, "But I don't know about marriage."

"Aw…"

Ruth eyed daggers at Marie.

"I wanted to be a bridesmaid."


	7. Chapter 7

As the sun began to set and the lights flickered on in Atlantis, Elizabeth was sat with her nieces in the commissary, half her attention on the tablet computer sitting beside her food. She nodded to Ronon as he walked past their table, headed to get some food, and frowned, a little confused, as Marie continued to gaze at him, fork halfway to her mouth.

"…Marie?" she laughed quietly, for the girl's appearance was quite comical.

"Is Mr Ronon a giant?" Marie asked.

Ruth almost choked and set her fork down, trying not to laugh.

"No," Elizabeth answered, "He isn't."

"You think he's a giant?" Ruth giggled.

"He might be!"

"No, Marie, he isn't," her aunt repeated, "He's just very tall. But he is from another world, like we said," she smiled, "And you don't have to call him 'Mr' Ronon."

Marie frowned, "But Mom and Dad always told us to be polite."

"Well, then we call Doctor McKay 'Doctor' and John 'Colonel Sheppard' and so on, right?" Ruth looked to Elizabeth for reassurance.

"I'm sure your teachers will tell you how they want you to address them. Otherwise, I'm sure people won't mind you using their first names. We aren't so formal here unless the situation requires it."

"Is that why John smacked Doctor McKay round the head earlier?" Ruth tried to hide a smile.

Elizabeth sighed and raised her eyes to the heavens, but couldn't help but smile too, "Yes, that is why John smacked Doctor McKay round the head. That behaviour seems unique to the two of them though. I've never seen Ronon hit Doctor McKay round the head."

"It takes a great amount of self control," Ronon mumbled, walking back past them.

Marie grinned, "Doctor McKay would fall over."

"More like be flattened," Ruth countered.

"Yeah…"

"Girls…" Elizabeth tried to chastise them, but was unable to stop smiling.

"Sorry," they chorused, clearly not at all.

"We still have some unpacking to do, and there's a crate of books for you if you want to go and take a look when we're done?"

"Lots of books?" Ruth looked hopeful.

"…As many books as we could bring. You'll have to wait for the next time the Daedalus goes back to Earth, or when we can, to get more, so you have to make them last," Elizabeth replied, "I never thought I'd say this to you girls, but you're going to have to learn to read slower," she teased.

"From what Doctor McKay said…we're gonna get a lot of homework…we'll probably end up doing that in said of reading the nice books," Marie said.

Ruth's eyes widened, "Our teachers will always know where to find us! We'll never get away with anything!"

"Aunt Lizzie, you can order people around, right?"

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes and mock glared at her nieces, "Not to get you out of your homework."

"Aw…"

"Worth a shot…"

* * *

It turned out that both girls had sneaked several books in with their clothes, so there was no need to break into the books Elizabeth had raided the shops back on Earth for. She left the children laughing, giggling as they recited sentences from their books across to each other. Elizabeth knew there was little point in demanding they go to sleep when she told them, so she bade them goodnight and left their quarters, hoping they would tire themselves out soon with too much reading. She hovered outside their door for a few minutes, smiling and listening to their laughter, before she wandered back to her own quarters and immediately snatched up her tablet computer to catch up on work she believed she should have already done that day. She had no desire for anyone to comment she was spending more time with the children than she was performing her duties. 

Honestly, Elizabeth had been worried that one, or both, of her nieces would react badly to arrival in Atlantis. The thought had occurred to her that they thought it was all some elaborate trick, as Ruth had said when she realised it wasn't. Realising they really weren't in America, or even on Earth, anymore, could have sent them over the edge so soon after the death of their parents. She had noticed that both girls still had sudden, still and quiet moments, which was to be expected. Even Elizabeth herself was experiencing such moments. It was all part of their grief. As long as she could get them settled in and as used to the strange life they were going to lead as possible, she hoped there would be no major disasters.

She was staring blankly at the screen, getting very little work done. She found herself chewing the end of the stylus at one point and had to set it down. It wasn't just their emotional state that was bothering her. Their safety was a major concern that she couldn't let go of. Elizabeth had already found herself worrying whenever she didn't have her nieces within her sight. She knew very well that she could trust the personnel of Atlantis with them, and she knew the fear for their safety was rather irrational (at least, at the moment), but she couldn't shake it.

A knock against the shot crystal glass of the door to her quarters made her look up from…well, she could hardly have said it was work she was looking away from, "Come in?"

The door opened to reveal John, who peered into her quarters, first one way, then the other, then back at her, head tilted.

"They're in their quarters," Elizabeth smiled slightly, "Though I can't say they're asleep. I just hope they don't keep everyone else awake."

He shrugged and stepped inside, "They're kids. Let 'em keep everyone up. Its part of the general kid manifesto," he wandered to sit on the edge of her bed, "So. How you holding up?"

"Well," she waved the tablet, screensaver dancing across it, in front of him, "I'm being productive, obviously," she tried a weary smile, "I'm never leaving for over a month again."

"I think I ran your city rather well," John teased.

"My city?" she raised an eyebrow.

"Hey, I was afraid of breaking office furniture, let alone keeping the city standing…"

Elizabeth smirked, "Cute."

He reached out and took the computer away from her, "How do you feel? Really."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Exhausted," she stated.

John frowned, "Any more words coming after that?"

"Not really. They'd be inarticulate and frankly downright embarrassing."

He set the computer down on her bedside table, "You're talking to the king of inarticulate," he kicked off his shoes.

"Make yourself at home," Elizabeth smiled, pretending to be angry.

"I also do downright embarrassing very well, we all know that," John shuffled over and next to her, "So go for it."

She sighed deeply, "Let's just say I could see the girls at twenty when I knew they were safe back on Earth. Now I'm wondering if they'll even reach sixteen."

He blinked, "…Earth gets targeted just as often as Atlantis, people just don't know about it…"

"That's exactly what General Landry said," Elizabeth replied. She closed her eyes, "But that's just it – people don't know on Earth when they could be dead in the next ten minutes. Ruth and Marie are going to be very aware of every time we get attacked, and they're going to see shooting and blood and violence and…everything…" she opened her eyes and glanced across at him, "and, no matter how hard I try, I won't be able to shield them from it all. Because I'm the one ordering the shooting and the violence most of the time…"

"As a last resort," John insisted.

"As a last resort or not – they're going to see things girls their age shouldn't. And one day they'll ask what part I really play in all this. Saying that I lead the city just won't cut it."

He was quiet for a while, staring straight ahead, "…And what about kids in war-torn countries? They see worse everyday."

Elizabeth nodded, "…I know…but they're not from a war-torn country. They're little girls used to the worst thing happening to them being their Mom telling them they can't go to a party…" a look of horror passed across her face and she winced, hiding her head in her hands, "Or their parents dying and leaving them orphaned…"

"I know what you meant," he reassured her.

"But they shouldn't have to see what's they're going to. Its not a price that should be paid for their future and they don't have a choice."

"If they're going to have the future that's intended for them, then they'll have to get very used to seeing what we see every day."

"Intended for them," Elizabeth repeated, "Nobody ever gave them a choice…"

"'Lizabeth, you have to stop thinking like this. We're all going to look out for Ruth and Marie. They'll be grateful for all of this one day. Don't second guess everything before its even happened," he said softly.

She was silent seemed utterly lost for a moment.

John wrapped an arm around her and brought her to rest against him, "You need to rest," he said.

Her only response was a yawn she tried to hide.

"Just because you're looking out for the girls, doesn't mean nobody's looking out for you, you know that?"

Elizabeth managed to nod, once, slowly. She brought up one hand and curled it around his shoulder, allowing herself to be comforted and trying not to think about how she would be several months into her new life as a parent.

* * *

Teyla paced back and forth in the gym, twirling one battle stick in her right hand. She was absolutely exhausted, but stupidly, to her, afraid of falling asleep. Numerous nightmares, even if they occurred every night, did not necessarily mean a nightmare was certain to happen if she slept. She knew she had to sleep. It wasn't as if she could stay awake forever. She kept pacing, kept twirling the stick. 

The nightmares ranged from what few memories she had of her mother, twisted and torn apart, to watching her Atlantean friends and colleagues fall around her, whilst she couldn't make a move to help them, even as they cried out to her. Sometimes the Wraith were in her dreams. Sometimes she was a Wraith. She was getting sick of having no voice in the mornings, thanks to her night screaming, whether she woke herself or not.

"They are only dreams…" Teyla muttered to herself, over and over.

She couldn't stop pacing.

* * *

It was still dark when Ruth rose and padded slowly across her quarters, to stand by the windows. She leant against the cool glass, one hand pressed against the surface. Hair in disarray, she tugged some of it back, only to have curls fall back into place across her face. She could hear the ocean. Not like the steady rhythm of the waves she had sometimes heard back on Earth, it was almost as if she could hear it swirling and pulsing. She assumed that she would grow to find the noise comforting, but, for now, it was a foreign sound in a foreign environment, and was only helping to keep awake. Even if she never found the noise comforting, she presumed she would learn to block it out. How else did anyone get any sleep in the city otherwise? 

Ruth glanced back, just about able to make out the huddled form of Marie in her bed, blankets tucked closely around her, as always. Her sister usually slept like a log. Getting her to wake up in the mornings was a daily trial. She wondered why the sound of the ocean didn't bother her. Then, she supposed, a foghorn on full volume wasn't likely to wake her.

If her Aunt Elizabeth was capable of lying to her family about where she was and what she did, what else did that make her capable of? What did that make anyone capable of? Other galaxies and planets and aliens and…everything…and hardly anybody on Earth knew. Would it be such a bad thing for them to know? What exactly was there to hide? And now Ruth herself was involved in the cover-up. The two aliens she had met so far seemed perfectly nice. The city of Atlantis itself didn't seem such a bad place. Why hide it? What was so important about the meaning of other life existing that it had to be hidden?

She didn't understand. On some level, she wasn't sure she wanted to. If she had to keep a secret, then she would, she had sworn to her aunt and to others. Ruth had no idea what would happen if she broke her promise. Perhaps she would be punished. Maybe they would hurt Marie. Maybe she would never get to see anyone ever again. Maybe they would kill her.

Ruth trusted her aunt. A woman she, in all honesty, barely knew, but she trusted her. She had to. And she had to look out for Marie when nobody else could.

The girl paced slowly back across the room and clambered back into her bed. She faced the wall and began counting slowly in her head, hoping it would send her to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

"What's that?" Marie asked, as Carson ran one of the Ancient scanners over her.

"We don't need shots or anything, do we?" Ruth hopped up onto the opposite bed.

"No, you don't," Carson replied, "and this here device is telling me exactly what's going on in that body of yours," he explained.

The younger of the two girls paled a little, "…Exactly? Like…you can see inside me?"

"It tells me how you're doing, but I can't see right inside you, lass."

"So…you don't need to do things like blood tests and use things like stitches here?" Ruth questioned.

"We still run blood tests to be sure and we still use stitches, but we have more advanced methods of healing here. Its not our technology though," Carson said as he set the scanner down, "You're perfectly fine, little miss," he strode across the room and retrieved a small object, before returning to Marie, "Here, hold this."

Marie reached out slowly to take the sphere he held out to her. She gripped it and held it up, frowning, "What's it supposed to do?"

"Nothing, in your case," Carson ruffled her hair and took the sphere back, "Its just a little test we have, its harmless. From what we understand, it was a toy, it glows, reacts to the presence of the Ancient gene."

"The gene Ruthie has?"

"Exactly," he turned and held out the sphere to Ruth.

She took a great deal longer than Marie to reach out and wrap her fingers round the supposed 'toy'. A golden glow sprang up across her palm, progressing to green and then to blue. Ruth stared down at her hand, then quickly handed the sphere back to Carson, "People know about this sort of thing and they never say anything to their friends back on Earth?"

"They're bound not to, love. The consequences are worth not saying a word. If anyone else knew…they could be put in great danger…"

"But we have this kinda thing and we don't use it, 'cept for here?" she carried on.

"Some technology is used back on Earth, but in controlled conditions and only by those who already know about things like Atlantis…" Carson frowned, not sure he liked where the conversation was going. The girl before him looked decidedly angry. A little curiosity was good, but too much was very, very dangerous. Especially for a girl of her age.

"…Maybe they could've used some of these things to save Mom and Dad…" Ruth said softly. Her fingers gripped the bed beneath her tightly. Abruptly, she jumped down from the bed and walked across the infirmary, heading for the door.

"Ruth!" Marie called out after her.

"Ruth, we still have your exam to do," Carson tried to call her back.

She glared back at them, torn between what she should do and the urge to escape. Flight won and she ran from the Infirmary, realising at the same moment she had no idea of the way back to her quarters.

"…She misses Mom and Dad…" Marie uttered, pushing herself back on the bed she sat on and drawing her knees up, "Like I do…"

Carson sighed and sat down beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, "You're allowed to miss them, you know that?"

She nodded, "…I know. I do miss them…" her voice became a thin wail as she burst into tears, "…I miss them…I love Aunt Lizzie, but I miss them…" she sobbed, "I want…them back."

He picked her up and set her on his lap, holding her tightly, "Its okay," he said quietly, "Its okay. Cry for as long as you need. I know I did when I lost my father."

"You…lost your dad?"

"About fifteen years ago," Carson nodded, "I'm not telling you the hurt will go right away, but it will get easier for you…" he trailed off, "They're not really gone, you know…they're inside you and your memories and everything they taught you…"

Marie sniffed, "That's what Uncle Chris said…"

"Well then…two of us can't be wrong, right?"

"Marie, Carson, what's-" Elizabeth halted a few paces away from them, and, having entered the Infirmary at a leisurely pace, then practically ran the remaining distance, "Marie, are you okay?"

"Wee lass misses her Mum and Dad," Carson explained.

"Oh, Marie…" her aunt said in a hushed whisper, "Come here," she sat down on the bed opposite and wrapped her arms around Marie as she jumped down to the floor and then into her arms.

"I'm sorry," Marie clung to her.

"No, no, Marie, there's nothing to be sorry for," Elizabeth rocked her against her slowly. She mouthed a silent 'thank you' to Carson and rested her head against her niece's. She glanced around the Infirmary as a frown crossed her face, "…Where's Ruth?" she asked, keeping her voice soft.

Carson winced, "…She ran out of here a few minutes ago."

She tensed and moved as if to stand.

"Leave her be," he stated, "Everybody in the city knows to look out for her, there's not much mischief she could get up to…"

"Is she upset?"

He nodded, "I'd say so. I'm sorry, Elizabeth."

Elizabeth shook her head, "Its not your fault. All this must still be a lot to take in," she looked down at Marie, "Isn't it?"

Marie nodded, silently.

"You stay with the little one. I'll go see if I can find Ruth," Carson stood up and made for the Infirmary doors.

"Thank you," she called after him as he left. She knew she should be going to search for Ruth herself. But she had a duty to Marie just as much as she had to her own daughter and she wasn't ready to start making a distinction between the two when they had been brought up as sisters. She had never made any claim to Ruth. She shouldn't start now.

"…You think Mom and Dad can…can see us here in this place like those Ancient people can?" Marie asked. Even in Elizabeth's embrace, she looked rather lost, short brown hair ruffled all out of place, eyes still full of tears.

"…I think so…" Elizabeth answered. She didn't like to give a definite answer, not to a child so young, and one who was to come to find the possible and the impossible mixed far too frequently to be comfortable with it, "Marie, does Atlantis scare you?"

The girl didn't answer immediately. She wiped her eyes and looked up, "…Yeah…kinda. 'Cause its all new and I don't know my way around and I don't know all the people… But its gotta be like when we moved house before – I'll get used to it, right?"

Elizabeth had to smile, "Yes…I suppose you will."

"Should we go find Ruth?"

"Yes…we should."

* * *

John was making his way through the command centre when he saw a small figure rushing down the stairs, a figure who paused, glanced both ways, and decided against heading into the centre itself. 

"Ruth?" he called out.

Ruth hesitated, but wasn't knocked out of her stride.

"Ruth!" now John shouted, concerned, wondering what the young girl was doing rushing around the city on her own. He supposed the sight would be commonplace in a few weeks time, but not during her first week in Atlantis. He broke into a run and headed after her, catching up easily, and snatched at her wrist to hold her back, "Ruth?" he released her immediately when she stopped and didn't attempt to run again. John glanced around him, noting several disapproving looks from nearby personnel. Kids running around the city certainly wasn't acceptable to some of them, especially so close to the command centre.

"I can't find my quarters," she tried to explain.

He frowned, "Ruth, what's wrong?"

"I can't find my quarters," she repeated.

"Where're your sister and your Aunt Elizabeth?" he tried another tactic. He had already found Elizabeth's office empty and had found himself playing fetch and carry for the physics department.

Ruth finally made eye contact with him, "Marie's in the Infirmary with Doctor Beckett. Aunt Lizzie's working, she told us this morning."

John sighed, "Why are you running around the city on your own?" he cursed at the same moment the words left his mouth – he had no right to go all parental on her.

"I just want to go back to my quarters," she shot back.

Yep, this one was nearing her teens alright…

"Ruth…?"

"I just…" she sighed, "I just want to be on my own, okay?"

"I'll show you to your quarters, but I make no guarantees about the alone thing, okay?" he proposed. When she reluctantly nodded, John turned and shouted back to the command centre, "Someone get this to Zelenka!" he hurled the item he had been carrying through the air, belatedly hoping someone would catch it.

Laura Cadman glared at him as she snatched it out of the air, "You're a lucky man, Sir," she headed off down a level to access the science labs.

"Come on, let's get you home," John moved off ahead of Ruth, "You sure you don't want to go back to the Doc and find Marie?"

"Positive," Ruth said softly.

The walk back to her quarters was mostly silent, even though he tried to engage the girl in conversation many times. About to give up, John hit the door release to her room and waited for her to go inside.

The dark haired girl stood in the doorway, looking up at him, "Have you ever told anyone about this place?"

He shook his head, "No."

"Why not? Don't you think it'd do some good?"

"And a lot of damage. Some things people don't need to know. I found out about all this by accident. I did fly planes, but I couldn't let this go. Telling everyone would just create chaos, people would get hurt," he elaborated.

"People could be saved," Ruth insisted.

"And a lot of people would die, a lot of people would be put in danger if they found out about all this…"

"But you could save people! People you love! All the stuff in this city…Mom and Dad…they might have lived if everyone knew about this!" she cried.

"Ruth…trust me…its because I love people that I'll never tell them about this and about what I do. We have some advanced technology, but we don't know how to use half of it. Its not a miracle cure. It isn't magic and it isn't perfect…" he tried to explain, knowing he was probably, in her eyes, failing miserably.

Tears began to fall from her eyes, "I wanna fix it…if I had been with them in the car then I'd be with them…"

John guided her back into her quarters and sat her down on the edge of her bed, "…I know it hurts. And I know you're running every single possibility that could've happened in your head right now, aren't you? Have been since it happened."

She nodded, staring at the floor.

"You can't…change things…even if it hurts and you wish you could and you'd do anything. The pain fades…even if it takes a while, and sometimes even if you don't want to lose the pain. Just because you don't hurt every minute of each day doesn't mean you've forgotten them or don't care," he said quietly, "…Marie needs you. And so does your Aunt Elizabeth, believe it or not."

"…It just…it feels like…I'm betraying them and they're not even here…"

"You're not betraying anyone, Ruth. Remember what you can do with all this. And when you're grown-up, who knows? It might not be such a secret anymore."

The door to the room slid open at that moment to reveal Marie and Elizabeth in the doorway.

"Ruth! Where'd you go?" her little sister demanded.

"Ruth, you had me worried…" Elizabeth said.

"I'm sorry," Ruth mumbled, "I just wanted to come back here and I couldn't find my way. Colonel-"

"John," he nodded.

"…John," she repeated, "helped me find my way back. I'll go back to Doctor Beckett, I promise," she earnestly assured her aunt.

Elizabeth nodded as she entered the room, Marie running to hug her sister. As she watched the girls, her eyes seemed almost glazed over. Both her charges still had clearly tear-streaked faces. And she didn't know what to do. She just…didn't know. She had to be with them and she couldn't be. God, both of them had been upset beyond words and she hadn't even known.

When John finally made eye contact with her, he knew she felt just as broken as the girls.

She had failed them already.


	9. Chapter 9

"Yes, Carson. Don't worry, they're in their quarters. It seems John found Ruth. Or Ruth found John," Elizabeth tried to smile over at the two girls at the foot of one of the beds, then at John, who stood only a couple of metres from her, "Thank you for your help."

"I'll go back, I won't cause trouble, I promise," Ruth stood up, "I'm sorry, I'll let Doctor Beckett run the tests, I'm sorry, Aunt Lizzie, really, I-"

"Nobody's angry with you Ruth," she answered. She turned her attention back to Carson, speaking back into her mic, "We'll reschedule the exam if that's okay?" she nodded as she received a response, "I'll be down in the Infirmary in a couple of hours," she shut off the comms and let her gaze fall on her niece, "Ruth, you can't run off like that round the city. There are still places here we don't know about, it could be dangerous."

Ruth nodded solemnly and sat back down, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I just didn't know my way back by heart yet."

"I know. This must still be a shock to you both," she replied, "Are you girls okay for a minute? I need to speak to John for a moment."

"We'll be okay," Marie assured her. The fact that her words were accompanied by a sniff didn't make them seem all that convincing.

Elizabeth still had to take the girl at her word before she had a minor crisis herself. She nodded and headed for the door, expecting John to follow her, which he did. She headed a little way down the corridor, to the door of her own quarters, and only just stopped herself from sinking back against it, "What am I doing?" she asked aloud, staring at the ceiling.

"Elizabeth-"

"They've been here all of three days and they're both already in tears!" she exclaimed, frustrated.

"They could've been in tears the moment they got here, and they weren't," John tried to reassure her, "No screaming fits, no freaking out…"

She gestured in the direction of her nieces' quarters, "I would call that freaking out."

"I'd call that two recently bereaved girls missing their parents. They're going to cry, 'Lizabeth. Hell, I'd probably still be at the crying stage right now, wouldn't you?"

"Aren't I?" Elizabeth wouldn't look at him, hands curled into fists which she struck once against her door, "If they were upset, why couldn't they just tell me?"

"What kid is going to go and announce to anyone that they're upset? It probably just crept up on them or something, it doesn't mean they don't trust you or anything," he continued, "And how long did it take you to adjust after we got here? How long did it take all of us to adjust! I'm sure there're quite a few people here who still cry themselves to sleep at night, and they aren't little girls."

She raised an eyebrow, "Very reassuring."

"You know what I mean," John said, voice stern.

Elizabeth sighed, "Where was Ruth? Did she run into you or did someone take her to you?"

"She was headed down the stairs and ran away from the command centre," he explained, "she wouldn't stop when I called, so I ran after her and stopped her."

"I should reprimand her."

He shrugged, "Probably. If she pulls that kinda stunt again and we don't know where she is… And if someone who isn't so thrilled at the kids in Atlantis idea finds her and not someone sympathetic to the situation…"

She nodded, "I'll have to talk to her, to both of them," she shook her head, "I need them to trust me, not to think I'm the evil aunt…"

"Hey, they adore you, you know that," John answered, "anyone can see it. They trust you, they're just a little confused. Wouldn't surprise me if they're still expecting someone to leap out and say its all a joke…"

Elizabeth's eyes widened, "You really think so?"

"They're kids. Anything's possible. You telling me you believed all this at once when they told you?"

She smiled slightly, "No. Not at all."

"There you go. If either of them are anything like you, then they're probably having the same doubts you did," he returned the smile, "I gotta say though, if this is a practical joke, it's a damned convincing one."

Elizabeth wiped away a couple of stray tears that had threatened to escape, "Very convincing, yes. The special effects are amazing."

"Must cost a lot of money…"

"Thousands…"

"Millions, even."

She laughed, "Thank you, John. And for staying with Ruth too."

"Anytime. Well, except when I'm being chased halfway across this galaxy. In that case - call Ronon. Guy's gonna have to get used to the piggyback concept," John smiled. "She has your eyes, you know."

Her smile faded a little, "…I know. Waves in her hair too," her eyes glazed over as she looked back. She kept her voice low, "Her father's hair was so straight I swear you'd never have convinced it to curl. She has some of his features though…" She folded her arms, "Its Ruth's thirteenth birthday next week."

"We having a party?"

"I didn't know whether it was appropriate or not…not to mention there're no other children here…"

"I'd say it was appropriate. And if mental ages count, we're set," he grinned.

"It might help her, and Marie, settle in, I suppose," Elizabeth nodded, "I have her birthday presents from the family, the small ones anyway. I know Marie has got her a present, I saw her sneak off to the checkout when Ruth wasn't looking in a store when we went shopping."

"Go for the party thing. If it backfires…it backfires, she'll know everyone tried," he frowned, "I meant to say, the Athosians that want out? I said someone would meet them on the mainland tomorrow morning."

"That someone meaning me."

"Yep."

"Okay, I'll look over their case and…" she shrugged, "I guess we can't stop them leaving. We can't keep them here, we don't rule over them."

"Aunt Lizzie?" Marie's voice was heard at the same time as theswish of a door opening, "Do we have lessons today?" she called.

Elizabeth headed back down the corridor, "No, Marie, you don't. They might start tomorrow though, we're still sorting out times. I spoke to your history teachers today, both said they could start lessons with you tomorrow."

"Teachers?" Ruth joined her sister at the door, "More than one?"

"Well, both have their own areas they specialise in. Both can teach you the history of some of the civilisations in this galaxy and some others back in our galaxy, but one can teach you modern Earth history and the other, ancient."

"Ancient as in those people-"

"As in Greece, Rome, Egypt, ancient histories of Earth," she elaborated.

"Are you still teaching us Math?" Ruth asked, looking up at John.

"If you guys can put up with me," he teased.

Elizabeth suddenly reached out and hugged both girls tightly to her, "I love you girls, you know that?" she stepped back, "But I have to get back to work. I have a meeting tomorrow to prepare for."

"Can John stay?" Marie asked.

"Yeah, can John stay?" the Colonel grinned.

Her hands rested on her hips, "I don't know. What was John doing before John got here?" she asked, smile in her voice.

"John was playing fetch and carry. John was very bored. John would rather show Marie and Ruth more of Atlantis," he smirked and tried to keep from laughing.

Elizabeth sighed deeply, "You can stay. If Colonel Caldwell catches you, you're explaining. Ruth, I told Doctor Beckett he could do your exam in two hours, understand?"

The girl nodded, "Yes, Aunt Lizzie."

"I'll see you all later…" she headed off down the corridor.

"We're surrounded by water. Does this city have a pool?" she heard Marie ask.

"Does it ever!" John clapped his hands.

Elizabeth looked down at the ground and smiled, then quickened her pace to her office.

* * *

At the same time as Elizabeth reached her office, Teyla walked rather slowly into the Infirmary. To say she was practically stumbling would have been an accurate description by anyone who had actually seen her. Namely Carson. 

"Teyla, what in the world-"

She stopped a few feet away from him, one hand held to her head, "I…have a headache…" she uttered.

Carson rushed to her, for she looked like she might hit the floor at any second, "You have more than a headache," he countered, "You're not sleeping. Deliberately," he accused, in soft tones.

"I cannot sleep," Teyla insisted she was innocent. However, she followed the statement with a lie, "I have had a few hours sleep."

"No, you haven't," the Doctor stated, as his patient tripped over her own feet.

Her expression abruptly altered, "I will not sleep," she said, voice harsh, "I cannot. I will not. I must not sleep…" Teyla's voice became quiet as she stumbled again.

"They're just dreams, love. There's more to this than you're telling us, isn't there?"

She lost consciousness and would have slumped to the floor if Carson hadn't have caught her. With the help of an alerted nurse, he settled Teyla on a nearby bed, checking her pulse. Thankfully, it was still steady.

"What're you doing to yourself…?" he asked aloud, gazing down at her. He looked back at the nurse, "We'll run full blood works, check her body for bruising. We'll have to monitor her brainwaves, check her output, what areas of her mind are active and which aren't. Maybe something's misfiring somewhere," Carson sighed and went to retrieve the necessary equipment to draw blood. He paused and glanced back at the still form of Teyla. If they were just any old nightmares, she wouldn't be depriving herself of sleep. She wouldn't be desperate, she wouldn't be afraid to sleep.

"Doctor?" the nurse noted his hesitation with a frown and tilt of her head.

"…Knock her out…good and proper. We'll dose her up, keep her below REM sleep…she needs to sleep. And we don't need to torture her," Carson continued to select the equipment for the blood work, "and call Doctor Weir, please."

"Right away."

* * *

On hearing of Teyla's status, Elizabeth called together the rest of her team to her office, since they were the most likely people to know where she had been during the night. Sleepwalking was proposed by Rodney as one answer for her current state, and instantly rejected. Somebody would have seen her, seeing as the whole city never slept at once. 

"She wanted to spar," Ronon offered, "She tried to goad me into it, but I refused. She seemed aggressive, even for her. I couldn't get her to go see Beckett."

"Why didn't you drag her?" McKay questioned.

"If you'd seen her, you'd know why."

"Does anyone know if she's had any sleep in days?" Elizabeth asked.

"Major Lorne said she woke him with her screaming…a comment in passing, but that was a few days ago…" Rodney shrugged.

"And there are no Wraith ships in the vicinity? No Wraith that could be communicating with her? Giving her these nightmares?"

"None that we can see. But we don't know everything about Wraith technology, as much as it pains me to say it. I guess we work on the principle that if they were here, they'd have beaten the crap out of us by now."

"The Wraith communicate with her?" Ronon looked a little stunned, even for him.

"…Its…genetic…she has some Wraith DNA…" Elizabeth tried to explain, "her forefathers were altered…It wasn't a procedure carried out on her, as far as we know…"

"Its how she can sense them. You never asked?" Rodney frowned.

"Could've been an ability all her people have…" Ronon answered.

"Well, Colonel Sheppard said he had no idea of her sleeping patterns," Elizabeth sighed, "He knows she's been in the gym a couple of times, but beyond that…we're all rather clueless."

"No wraith could communicate with her from another planet alone," Rodney stated.

"So are we to think these are just ordinary nightmares?"

"She could have a lot of trauma in her past. Things she's blocked out. They could just be nightmares, but her trauma. Still means she's in agony, wraith, interference or otherwise. Still means something has to be done," Ronon said.

"Carson has her heavily sedated so she can't enter REM sleep…" Elizabeth replied, "But from what I remember of biology, you have to enter REM sleep at some stage. He can't keep her out of it forever and just keep sedating her."

"Which means we need to speak to Teyla," Rodney replied.

"Nobody else is having nightmares like this?" she asked, "Nobody else in the city?"

"Nobody who's come forward. Certainly nobody in her state."

"Scan the area. Every square inch of space around us – I'm not risking there actually being a Wraith ship out there. I meet with some of the Athosian's tomorrow morning, I'll ask if any other amongst them are experiencing anything like this. Report back in an hour with anything you find," Elizabeth stood up and followed them to the door, "I'll be in the Infirmary with Carson and Teyla."

"Did I actually see one of your nieces run through the command centre this morning?" Rodney frowned.

"Yes, you probably did," she checked her watch, "Ruth's due in the Infirmary in half an hour anyway. Meet me there. Ronon, ask around please. I need to know if anybody else is even having a bad week, sleep wise."

"Will do," he headed off.

"See you in an hour, Rodney," Elizabeth quickened her pace and took the route for the Infirmary.

"Probably less," was the scientist's parting shot.

She didn't reply. She ran a hand through her hair and sighed – the last thing she needed right now was a threat to rain down upon the city. And if it turned out to be 'nothing', only Teyla's past trauma, as Ronon suggested…in a way, that was more worrying for her than another threat. If her friend was terrified to sleep…something had to be wrong…deeply, darkly, wrong.


	10. Chapter 10

Elizabeth headed out to the mainland with Carson the next morning, somehow not reassured by knowing there were no Wraith ships in the vicinity the city's sensors could scan. Atlantis might be advanced, but just because something wasn't being picked up, it didn't mean anything was there. Wraith technology had to have advanced in all those years. She twitched as the Puddle Jumper was set down – she had no idea why she was so determined to believe it was the Wraith, or something equally sinister, rather than just a string of horrific nightmares. Perhaps she was being over sensitive about the matter. Maybe knowing she now had to protect Ruth and Marie made her overly determined to find a threat and eliminate it before they even saw it.

Carson stood up and hit the release for the back of the Jumper, "Teyla's still asleep," he stated, as if he could read her mind.

Elizabeth nodded, "Keeping her sedated for the duration?"

"Until she's been under enough time to recoup the time she's lost, yes," he frowned, "and having her wake up and panic whilst this meeting was going on wasn't a good prospect."

"She doesn't want them to leave," she followed him outside.

"So I assume," Carson replied, "They're her people, she was their leader…I suppose its difficult for her to let go."

"Teyla's the only one of us who can see both sides of their argument…it's a little disturbing that she believes they're wrong to want to go and they're still insisting so vehemently," she mused aloud.

"I agree. But we can't exactly hold them prisoner."

"Precisely."

They headed off toward the main camp of the Athosians at a quick pace.

Elizabeth grimaced, "Why does this feel like an 'into the lion's den' situation?"

"Because they're going to bat back every argument we make? Or rather, you make."

"I knew there was something…"

-

"Okay, just for the record, things are going to get a little complicated…" Louise Horrill began, blinking nervously down at her two young students.

"Why?" Marie asked, tilting her head.

"Well…there's the 'official' histories and there are the…not so officially histories…the ones involving actual aliens in mythology…"

"The ones we aren't supposed to know, but have to?" Ruth presumed.

"Exactly. So…" Louise frowned, "I guess the best way to go about this would be to teach you the proper, academically approved versions of things…and start afresh or tweak things with the 'need to know' versions later on…"

"Some crazy guy in my class back home said the pyramids in Egypt were built by aliens. There's some weird theory that if everybody in the world heads to the pyramids and they all hum at the same key, the aliens will come back," Ruth said.

Their teacher frowned, "Okay…well, the pyramids were built by aliens and we really don't want them coming back. Ever. At all."

"They were?" Marie stared.

"They were."

"Okay…maybe not so crazy after all…" Ruth conceded.

"But," Louise held up a hand, absently tucking a strand of blonde hair that had escaped her ponytail back at the same time, "Archaeologists have complete theories of how the pyramids were constructed by humans, by the Ancient Egyptians, which are accepted in, I'd say ninety-five percent of scholarly circles. The ones that don't know about the Stargate."

"But if they weren't, what's the point in letting them carry on with those theories? Aren't they just making fools of themselves?"

"Its not so foolish if you don't know about the supposed 'truth'. And if you have all the evidence to back your theory up, then its fair play that your theory is most likely correct."

"So the world's living a lie?" Ruth questioned.

Louise sighed, "They're…living the truth according to everything a person is taught to believe. In evolution, in the human race. Its our history as human beings, as we can explain things with only ourselves to consider as tools."

"But it's a lie."

"It's a theory accepted as fact. Until the real fact can be widely accepted as truth, then that's what must be believed. By choice or through lack of evidence."

"But-"

"Ruth, I wanna learn both stories, be quiet," Marie glared at her sister, "Just 'cause we'll know one and everyone thinks another doesn't mean people are stupid."

Louise smiled, "Well said, Marie."

Ruth seemed more chastened by her sister than by their teacher's responses to her questions. She reluctantly backed down, "I'm sorry, Doctor. I wanna learn too. I didn't mean to be rude."

"Its okay, Ruth. Debate is encouraged here," she smiled slightly, "Just when you have all the facts to form an argument with."

"Where do we start?" Marie asked.

"I thought perhaps the bronze age might be a good place to start. There's a great difference between bronze age Britain, Greece and Egypt, for a start. Some cultures seem positively primitive compared to others at this time. Some make advances quickly and others are more influenced by the innovations of other cultures than their own."

"Bronze age? Does that mean cave men?"

"Not quite. That's a sort of stereotype. We'll go back to earlier man once we've done some work on the first civilisations, okay?"

Both girls nodded.

"Right," Louise began again, "Have either of you girls ever heard of Nubia or the Levant?"

-

"Doctor Weir, thank you for meeting with us."

The so called 'leader' of the group of Athosians who wanted to leave was a great deal younger than Elizabeth had expected. She wasn't surprised to find it was a woman, but she was shocked by how young she seemed. She had to be even younger than Teyla. There were several other, older, Athosians present, children also, but she had to wonder why they let this woman have authority over them. By what she had seen of their culture, older usually meant wiser.

"Anything I can do to help your people…" Elizabeth paused almost awkwardly, realising she didn't know the woman's name, and waited for it to be supplied by someone.

"Cyrelli," the woman, well, little more than a girl, responded.

"Thank you, Cyrelli."

"I don't mean to be rude, but there is little you could ever say that would change our minds about leaving this planet."

Well. That was upfront.

"I'm still not entirely certain why you're so set on leaving… We've done everything we can for you, food, medicine, help with your crops, housing…anything you've asked. We've nearly always gone out of our way to ensure you're comfortable," Elizabeth replied.

"Medically speaking, for one, it would be a great disadvantage for you to leave. Many of your children and people have been vaccinated and treated by us, some are even on antibiotics we've provided. Some need to stay on medication we've given them for life," Carson said.

"They survived before they began they medication and they'll survive without it," Cyrelli answered, a little too sure of herself.

"Aye, with a great decrease in their quality of life. Not to mention it'd shorten their life expectancy."

"Doctor, are you here to threaten us, to tell us we have no way to survive without your support?" she glanced at Elizabeth through narrowed eyes.

"No," Weir shook her head, "No, that's not what we mean to imply at all. But you can't deny it – some of your people need our help and will do for the foreseeable future. Do you expect them to blindly follow you and risk their lives?"

"Nobody is blindly following. We are all of the same belief, the same mind."

Carson frowned at that statement, but kept quiet.

"If you want to leave, we won't stop you, we'd just like to know the particular reasons for your desire to leave not only this planet, but the rest of your people," Elizabeth tried.

"We stated our reasons to Colonel Sheppard. We don't believe you are taking everything into account in your dealings with certain races. The Wraith, for one. We hear an alliance was formed. An alliance? With the Wraith? It is unthinkable. You don't take our lives into account, only those of your city. You put up your shield and assume everyone is safe, when we are the most vulnerable here on the mainland. Simply because we are more primitive than your culture seems to be, it doesn't make us wrong," Cyrelli insisted.

At that moment, a child on one side of the tent-like enclosure rushed at another opposite him, a girl. Pouncing on her, he began to beat her, shaking her and screaming at her, "I'll kill you! I swear it, I'll kill you!"

"Oh my god…" escaped Elizabeth's lips.

One of the elder Athosians lunged to pull the children apart. The girl didn't, as would be expected, remain in a stunned state of shock, but glared at her attacker, a sudden savage look in her eyes. She struggled to enact her revenge, which resulted in her removal from the tent altogether. The boy remained, suddenly calm again.

Cyrelli tried a smile, "Children of their age behave in the most peculiar manner."

"That's not normal," Carson frowned.

"Perhaps not amongst your children, Doctor Beckett. But we don't insist that our children suppress their urges at all times."

"Still-"

"We wish to use the ring tomorrow, your Stargate, to leave this world. We have chosen a new destination and wish to get there as quickly as possible," she turned her attention back to city's leader.

Elizabeth reluctantly nodded, a little disturbed by the behaviour of the children, "Of course…it is your right to use it, as we said in the early stages of our peoples' relationship."

Another of the Athosians yawned rather loudly and quickly exited the tent.

"How many of you want to leave?" she continued.

"Twenty," Cyrelli replied.

"Twenty?" Elizabeth echoed. The Athosian settlement wasn't small by any means, but twenty was still significant a number for her to be even more concerned, "Have you spoken with Teyla about this? From what I understand, she doesn't want you to go…"

"Teyla once spoke for us all, now she speaks only for herself. Or your people. Will you let us use the Stargate?" she seemed to speak of Teyla with great scorn.

"Don't take this the wrong way, we'll give you all the assistance you need – but once you leave, you can't keep dialling Atlantis for help. Some of our enemies still believe the city to be gone."

"We won't have to dial the city for any assistance, thank you. If you have the means, we would like to leave for our new home tomorrow afternoon."

"…I'll make sure we've enough jumpers active to bring your people to the city," Elizabeth nodded, disappointed.

"Thank you, Doctor Weir."

-

"Oh, sorry."

John looked up and across Elizabeth's office to see Ruth and Marie at the door, "Hey guys. Come on in."

"Doctor Kusanagi said Aunt Lizzie might be back by now, and if she was, she'd be here," Marie said as they wandered in.

"She's on her way here, as far as I know. She just got back from the mainland with Doctor Beckett."

"Mainland? There's land here? I thought it was just ocean," Ruth frowned, "Does that mean there's people?"

"Not native, but yeah. Teyla's people, the Athosians," John nodded.

"Doctor Beckett said Teyla was sick," Marie looked worried, "I like her. I hope she gets better soon."

"She was in the Infirmary when I was there for my exam," Ruth nodded, "…She didn't…look well."

John paused, "…She…hasn't been feeling great for a while now. We just need to figure out exactly what's wrong with her and then we'll fix her up, good as new," he hoped his voice didn't betray the concern that there was no sure way to 'fix her up'. He frowned, "Wait, you girls aren't just wandering the city again, are you? Your Aunt told you-"

"No," Marie shook her head, "Doctor Kusanagi took us to…" she looked around and pointed at the command centre through the glass wall of the office, "There, after our lesson when we asked about Aunt Lizzie. She said to come here."

"Well, she should be back any-"

"Minute now," Elizabeth's voice rang out across the room. She smiled, "How're things going?"

"I was gonna go sell Marie and Ruth as slaves, but as you're back, I probably shouldn't," John grinned, earning a giggle from Marie and a half smile from Ruth.

"I don't know…how much do you think you'd get for them?"

"Aunt Lizzie!" Marie protested, laughing.

"How'd the meeting with the Athosians go?" John asked.

"Badly. They still want to leave," Elizabeth sighed, "Tomorrow," she made no effort to reclaim her desk, "I'll tell you the details later, if you can hang on here for another hour?"

"Sure thing."

"Well girls," she turned to her nieces, "you've got a lesson with Doctor Mckay this afternoon, if I remember correctly…how about some lunch now?"

Ruth nodded, "Sounds good."

"I'm hungry," Marie agreed.

"Good, let's go then," Elizabeth began to herd them out of her office, trying to focus all her energy on them. She was too distracted by the Athosian situation for her liking.

John didn't miss the concerned glance she threw him as she left the room.


	11. Chapter 11

"Doctor McKay is evil."

Elizabeth stared at her youngest niece as she drew the covers up around her, "Excuse me?"

In her own bed, Ruth smiled slightly, "He gave her homework," she explained.

"He didn't give you homework!" Marie protested. She snatched the heavy physics volume she had to read from off her bedside table, "Its not fair."

"Why did he give you homework and not Ruth?" Elizabeth asked.

"He said I had to catch up," she answered, "I can't catch up two years so quickly! Ruth's two years ahead of me!"

"But physics was never my thing, you could be better at it than me for all we know," her sister tried to placate her.

"Doctor McKay probably wants to make sure you can work at the same level," Elizabeth said. "You don't want to have separate classes, do you?"

Marie shook her head, "…No."

"So you might have to do a little more reading for a while, okay?" her aunt glanced back at the other child across the room, "It couldn't hurt for you to refresh your memory and do some reading too, right?" she tried to prompt the elder girl to do some more reading at some point, if only to stop Marie from feeling she was being singled out.

Ruth looked a little reluctant, but she nodded all the same, "We can do some reading together," she proposed, still not entirely thrilled by the idea.

"Really?" Marie glanced over at her, hopeful.

"Really."

Elizabeth pried the physics volume from Marie's hands, tugging harder when her niece refused to relinquish the book, "You don't have to read it before you go to bed. You don't have another physics lesson with Doctor McKay tomorrow, you can read it sometime then, okay?"

"I don't want to fall further behind…"

"You aren't behind. Not for your age," she set the book down. "Read something fun," Elizabeth smiled and stood up, heading across the room to sit on the edge of Ruth's bed.

"Is the mainland like home?" Ruth asked her.

She paused for a moment, remembering that Atlantis wasn't 'home' to the girls as it was to her, "Not really," she replied. "Its kind of like a big forest. It has beaches and a couple of mountains, its like rough terrain. No proper structures or anything like that, only what the Athosians have built. I suppose its like home in the respect that its similar to unpopulated areas on Earth."

"Do we ever get to go there?"

"…Maybe one day," Elizabeth reluctantly replied. She certainly wasn't letting her nieces anywhere near the mainland yet. Definitely not after the behaviour she had seen in children their age recently. She stood up, "Lights out in fifteen minutes okay? And no longer, I know you two."

Marie nodded silently, engrossed in another book she had picked up.

"Fifteen minutes," Ruth nodded, and picked up a book of her own off her bedside table, "Night, Aunt Lizzie."

"Goodnight girls," she headed for the door and told herself not to look back as it slid shut behind her. She couldn't guard them night and day. She had to learn to let go. About to head to her own quarters, Elizabeth jumped as an arm caught her round the waist.

"Evening."

"Do you stalk me, Colonel?" Elizabeth teased, twisting to look back at him.

"Only when it suits me, Doctor," John responded, releasing her.

She smiled and let her fingers twine with his as they wandered the short distance to her quarters, "Any news I should be made imminently aware of?"

"Kusanagi seems impressed with the girls. Horrill says curiosity must run in your family."

"So, they're making quite an impression then?"

"I'd say so."

John frowned, "Oh…and Carson said Teyla's fighting the drugs. As he said, he has her on enough to 'knock out an elephant'."

Elizabeth hit the release for the door to her quarters, "Maybe she'll improve once the Athosians who want to leave are gone…maybe its stress…I don't know…it's a shame she won't be able to bid them farewell," she sighed. It was only when they were right inside her quarters that she realised they had wandered inside as if they were home to them. She decided to push the thought aside, for now.

He collapsed into a chair opposite the end of her bed, "How're you dealing?"

She sat down on the end of the bed and kicked off her boots, "Better than I thought I would be a couple of days ago, in all honesty." She shot him a wry smile, "How do people think I'm dealing?"

John shook his head, "Let's leave the idle banter amongst those not in the know out of it."

"That bad, huh?"

"They don't know what they're talking about. If you listened to the rumour mill out there, Rodney has secret wives on three planets and Teyla's in a coma because she's pregnant with a Wraith child."

Elizabeth blinked, rather taken aback, "That's horrible," she spoke of the last comment. "That's actually horrible."

"Vivid imaginations."

She drew her knees up to her chest, "I suppose people can't help it with what they see out here."

"Well, they should learn to keep it quiet," he commented.

Elizabeth shook her head and changed the subject, "Ruth and Marie seem comfortable with you. They like you."

He grinned, "Who wouldn't?"

She raised an eyebrow, "Very funny."

"…Seriously though. I'm glad," John admitted quietly.

Elizabeth kept thoughts about father figures to herself. That wasn't something she wanted to spring on him. Or even something she was sure she was taking that seriously. It was a fanciful idea. It wasn't as if either of the girls was going to start calling her 'mom' anytime soon, if ever. She wasn't sure how comfortable she would be with it if that situation ever came about. With Ruth…maybe being finally acknowledged as her real mother would satisfy some great maternal desire to be close to her daughter…but to be called 'mom' without the truth behind it would only tear her apart. And she knew it wasn't right for either of the girls to give up the memory of their parents for a great while.

But if she had to be mother and was throwing around ideas of John being their surrogate father…clearly there were depths to their relationship she was only just beginning to realise.

"I'm glad you're…glad…" she answered, almost awkwardly. She never had been so great at the stating of emotions aloud. It made her feel defenceless.

John looked away, "…I miss you," he stated.

She smiled faintly, sadly. It had been over a month since they had managed to spend any proper time together. Let alone get close. Hiding from the city suddenly seemed so much simpler than hiding from two young girls, in hindsight. Children always were more perceptive. She needed her nieces to understand that they were the most important thing in her life, and if that meant sacrificing her own desires then…

He had closed the distance between them in an instant, his lips on hers as he pushed her gently back onto her bed.

God, she missed him too.

Elizabeth let go. They could be quiet. Nobody would know.

She just wanted to be loved, wanted and protected too.

* * *

Early the next morning, against his better judgement, Carson lowered the dose of the concoction of drugs Teyla was on to keep her deeply asleep. He couldn't keep her under indefinitely or risk doing serious damage to her health. He knew some of her people were leaving and he knew she would want the opportunity to say goodbye, perhaps have one last chance to talk them out of it. Maybe the long sleep had done her good, drug induced as it was. If she could fight her way back to consciousness and remain relatively comfortable, then he wouldn't put her back under right away. 

He wasn't surprised when, an hour later, Teyla was blinking up at him, still drifting in and out of consciousness. He knew that feeling and didn't envy her. Like coming round from a general anaesthetic and not being able to cling to consciousness for more than ten seconds before the residual drug in the system knocked you right out again.

Another half hour later and she managed a weak, "Car…" before she fell asleep again. She didn't seem that distressed, which reassured the Doctor greatly.

Carson lowered the main dose further and added another, weaker, drug, in its place. He then sat by the Athosian's bedside, waiting for her to come round completely. After all, he supposed, if anything happened, he could just put her right back under again.

He hoped it wouldn't come to that.

* * *

Elizabeth was nervously pacing back and forth in the command centre. Something just didn't sit right with her about the whole Athosian situation. When she thought she wasn't be observed, the day before she had studied the features of the Athosians who had requested to leave. Some had looked like they could be family groups, others seemed to have no features in common with the rest of the group. Most had appeared to be groups of parent, singular, and grown child or children. Perhaps family units had been broken apart in cullings. It all seemed rather strange. But who was she to question who wanted to go, beyond why they wanted to go as a group? 

During a brief exchange of words with Halling, he had seemed resigned to the whole situation, unable to fight it. She had respected his apparent grief enough to break off her line of questioning and return to Atlantis.

Now they were all awaiting the arrival of the 'breakaway', as they were being called, Athosians in the 'Gateroom. The puddle jumpers sent to retrieve the group had docked back in the bay, and though she didn't want, nor did she require, a running commentary, the radio silence since docking disturbed Elizabeth a little.

She almost activated the comms to call John to ask what was going on, when the comm system activated before she could reach to make the connection.

"Sec," rang in the ears of the personnel present. A clatter and several heavy thuds followed.

"Sec?" repeated McKay, confused, "Have we implemented a code nobody cared to tell me about here?" he reactivated the comms, "Sheppard? What's going on down there?"

Only silence greeted him.

"Sheppard? Colonel, respond."

"John? What's going on?" Elizabeth added her voice, "John?"

"He can't hear you," Ronon stated, gruffly. He grabbed the back of Rodney's jacket, "Let's go."

"Me? Why do I have to go?" he protested.

"Because," Ronon practically dragged him from his chair.

"Go, Rodney," Elizabeth nodded, "Take a security detail with you," she added. She frowned, "…Sec…security…" she paused, before amending her orders, "Take two."

"Teyla's acting nuts and we let a bunch of Athosians into the city! We should never have let them anywhere near-"

"Rodney!" she snapped, "Go, now!" she wracked her mind for the location of her nieces. They were in lessons. Somewhere in the labs, they had to be safe…safe from whatever the hell was going on…

* * *

Ronon insisted they visit the Infirmary en-route. Though he had kept his suspicions to himself, whilst McKay had been more vocal, each seemed to be right on some level. 

The sight of Carson unconscious on the floor greeted them as they entered the room.

And Teyla was gone.


	12. Chapter 12

Elizabeth reluctantly left the command centre in the capable hands of a rather enraged Colonel Caldwell as she headed for the Infirmary. His contribution on the Athosian situation had been to state that they should have been left where they were, regardless of what they wanted. What was currently occurring only seemed to be proving him right. Though, as yet, they had no proof it was actually the Athosians. Since their own people were hardly likely to attack each other, the only answer, unfortunately, had to be the Athosians.

"What happened?" she demanded, a little too harshly, of a Carson who likely had a concussion, but, at that moment, was only graced with a headache he felt should have been shared round several people.

"She woke up," he stated, one hand pressed to his head.

"And?"

"And what? The girl hit me!" Carson replied, sharply. He sighed and mumbled an apology, "Teyla woke up, clearly distressed, and next thing I know Ronon and Rodney are standing over me. Where exactly are they headed, might I ask?"

"Jumper bay," Elizabeth said, "We've lost contact with our people," she folded her arms, "So Teyla just woke up and attacked you?"

"That's pretty much it," he nodded.

"…But she would never…"

"You and I both know that. Except for that one little incident where we had her connected to a Wraith…"

"You don't think…" she tilted her head, "That's impossible, Rodney and Radek said there were no ships in the vicinity of Atlantis."

"I don't know," Carson admitted, "But her knocking me out isn't the only problem we have here."

"You mean the Athosians?"

"No, I mean Teyla herself."

Elizabeth frowned, "You think she's a threat?"

"…Possibly. Its not the wellbeing of others I'm concerned about, its her condition. We were easing her to a lighter dose of sedatives in an attempt to wake her in a comfortable state. We also dosed her with valium to prevent her waking in an agitated state and to kill any stress related pain…" he explained.

"So… she's going to be rather spaced out, wherever she's gone?"

"Yes. And she may lose consciousness – one of the side effects is it's a drug that will sedate a person. It's what we intended to keep her on to start with, not to finish, but she fought it."

"She could be unconscious somewhere. Her own people could attack her. She hardly agreed with them," Elizabeth narrowed her eyes, "I'll have to put out search parties for her."

"Or…" Carson began.

"…Or?"

"Teyla could be fine. She could be better than fine – she could feel no pain and frankly batter any opponent into the ground without a second though for her own state."

"When was this given to her? And how?" she questioned.

"Recently and intramuscularly. So right now she could be high as a kite-"

"Or on the floor somewhere," Elizabeth finished, "We don't even have a margin to work with," she paused for a few seconds, mentally trying to organise her priorities, "Okay. Right, first we need to make contact with our people, assess the situation. Then we find Teyla."

"What about the girls?" he asked.

She shook her head and held up a hand, "I'm assuming they're safe, I'm trying not to think about it. They had a lesson with Miko. She's sensible, she won't do anything to risk their lives."

"And the Colonel?"

"…I don't know. That's what Ronon and Rodney are on the way to figure out," Elizabeth headed for the door, "Stay here – if we have causalities you'll be needed. I'm sorry Carson, I can't send you off-duty…"

The doctor's sigh could probably have been heard from orbit, but he understood, and so said so, "I'll be here if you need me," he answered. He slowly began to walk to his office, "Knocking back half a dozen painkillers…"

* * *

"…Crap…" was the first word out of John's mouth when he finally came round. Finding himself hunched over in the front of the jumper he had been piloting was not what he had been expecting. Perhaps an exchange of insults between the breakaway Athosians and some Atlantis personnel, but not to wake up to find every Athosian who had been in the jumper suddenly gone.

Strike that up as something else they didn't know about the Athosians. Some of them had to have the Ancient gene. Since some had the Wraith gene from the more roundabout way, he supposed that some having the Ancient gene in some form shouldn't be much of a surprise.

John shook his head in an attempt to rid himself of his dizziness. On finding it only caused pain, he stood up, head spinning, and muttered another curse. He wondered if his call for security had got through, and so activated his comms, "This is Sheppard," he stated.

"Colonel?"

He frowned on hearing Caldwell's voice, "Colonel?"

"Status report," Caldwell snapped.

"The Athosians are gone, they knocked me out cold. I presume they did the same in the other jumper. You need to track them."

"We're well aware of the need to track them, Colonel. What are their motives?"

John blinked several times, incredulous, "How the hell should I know!? They didn't exactly leave me a detailed plan before smacking me round the head! All I know is that they're loose somewhere in the city!"

"John?"

"Elizabeth?" he breathed a sigh of relief, "Any ideas?"

"No," she replied, "They wanted to leave, that's all we know. Some of the kids were acting a little strange, but surely they all know they can't overpower us to get to the 'Gate."

Rodney appeared at the door of the jumper, "Sheppard?"

"That would be me," the Colonel answered, "Seen any Athosians?"

"Not one," Ronon's voice, "Some unconscious personnel and muddy footprints, but that's it."

John frowned, "So what the hell do they think they're gonna do? Storm the 'Gate?"

"We don't know," Elizabeth said, "But we have another problem, gentlemen."

"Teyla's missing," Rodney explained.

"…Missing as in…?"

"As in gone from the Infirmary and left the doc on the floor unconscious," Ronon stated, as the security teams set about investigating the rest of the jumper bay.

"I thought she was sedated!"

"So did we…" McKay mumbled under his breath.

"Okay…" John sighed, "Here's the plan. You guys track the Athosians," he spoke to the command centre, "and we'll take them down."

"John, we don't even know why they've done this yet," Elizabeth reasoned.

He grit his teeth, "Your nieces are out there with them roaming the city," he replied, deliberately, to provoke her.

"I'm well aware of that, thank you."

"Get back here and we'll establish a plan," Caldwell interrupted, with a belated glance in Elizabeth's direction.

"Do it," she agreed.

* * *

The first thing Doctor Kusanagi did on hearing the city-wide announcement was rush and lock the outer door to the lab she was teaching in. With a nervous smile, she turned back to the children, only to find them staring at her, wide-eyed.

"Is Aunt Lizzie okay?" Ruth asked.

"Are we going to be okay?" Marie followed up.

"We…will be fine," Miko tried to assure them, "We should probably not remain in this room though."

"But you locked the door," the younger of the girls said.

"I mean we should move further into this complex of rooms," the doctor elaborated, "That outer door leads to the corridors of the city. We will be much safer away from it."

"I thought Teyla was an Athosian…" Ruth said softly, as she hopped down from her seat and dutifully followed Kusanagi into the next room, "She seemed so nice…"

"I doubt Miss Emmagan is involved in this…situation…"

"Are those people going to hurt us?" Marie asked, as Miko locked another door behind them.

Kusanagi sighed in frustration as she realised the room they had entered only had more doors and easier access, "Not intentionally, I believe," she answered. She glanced around the room, for once wishing the labs came equipped with weapons lockers, even if she only knew how to use a basic firearm. Point and shoot, right? Couldn't be more to it that than really. Had she been on her own, she wouldn't be so worried, but she had two young girls with her, under her protection. Not to mention that they were the family of the city's leader.

"Aunt Lizzie must be worried, or she wouldn't be searching and ordering everyone to stay away from those people," Ruth reached to grip her sister's shoulder, shoving her behind her in a faint attempt to be protective.

Miko was searching the lab for anything that could be used as a viable weapon. Bar the containers of liquid chemicals on one of the lab surfaces she could see nothing. She jumped as one of her colleagues wandered through from the next room.

"God, I didn't know those girls were here… Weir'll have our heads…" he commented.

"That is not what I'm concerned about!" she snapped, something very out of character for the usually gentle young woman.

"Well, what the hell are we supposed to do?"

"…Kuso…" Miko whispered miserably. She had just remembered why she was so agitated – the labs were located near one of the main control stations for various aspects of the city's power regulation. It was why the labs had been situated, and had grown around, the area in the first place. If she were attacking a city, she knew it was where she'd head straight for, "We have to leave," she insisted.

"And go where?"

"We could go back to our quarters," Marie innocently suggested.

At that moment, one of the doors crashed open to reveal a tall Athosian woman in the doorway. She tilted her head and frowned on catching sight of the girls, "…I was not aware there were children here…"

In desperation, Miko reached for one of the larger of the beakers of chemicals and flung it at the woman.

"Oh, great work, Kusanagi!" Doctor Mossoe snapped sarcastically.

The Athosian woman let out a shriek from between clenched teeth as the acid hit her and ran down her arm. Hissing, she stepped back, only to reveal three more of her people behind her, "That was not a clever thing to do," she spat.

"Ruth, Marie," Mossoe called, trying to urge them into the next room.

Marie, however, rushed toward their attackers in protest as one of them struck Miko unconscious, who had stepped in front of her charges to protect them.

"Marie!" Ruth cried out, running for her sister.

"Don't be stupid!" he lunged for her, too late, and she easily slipped through his grasp.

One of the males of the party easily overpowered Mossoe and wrenched one arm up and behind his back, "Tell me…what would one exactly have to do to overload this precious city's power systems…?"

"Go to hell!"

Two women were easily restraining Ruth and Marie, who struggled to no avail.

The man sighed and snatched the earpiece from his captive before snapping his neck with a great deal of ease.

Marie desperately suppressed the urge to throw up, tears in her eyes, whilst Ruth stared at the ground, shivering.

The earpiece was handed to the woman who had appeared in the doorway first. She examined it for a moment, trying to figure out how it worked. She looped it round her ear and adjusted the microphone, then tried activating it, "Atlantis. Doctor Weir, this is Cyrelli. This city is an abomination and it shall be destroyed, with, or without your personnel present. We are giving you a chance to evacuate, but in case you attempt to stop us, let me tell you we have two of your personnel's' children. I do not know if there are more, but I suggest you do as we say before something…unfortunate…happens," she threw the earpiece on the floor, "Let's go," she whirled for the door, only to stop when faced with another figure.

Pupils dilated and a with a slight smile on her face, there stood Teyla, "Cyrelli."

"Teyla. I assume you have come round to our way of thinking."

Teyla's smile broadened, "Yes, I have."

* * *

"Their weapons are unsophisticated, and there are, what, twenty of them? They don't stand a chance!" Caldwell said, as several attempts to re-establish communications with Cyrelli proved futile, "Send out team and disable them."

"They have my nieces," Elizabeth reminded him, showing great control for someone in her situation.

"So you're saying we just take the chance that they're bluffing and they wont hurt the girls?" John shot at Caldwell. He unclipped his P-90 from his vest and set it down on the console beside him.

"What good would it do them? They're just bargaining chips."

"They are _not_ just bargaining chips!" Elizabeth responded, outraged.

"I mean in their eyes, Doctor. Harming them would do them no good in the long run. Harming them would only aggravate us further and ensure we made some attempt to stop them."

"I'm with Caldwell," Ronon stated, "They don't stand a chance if we rush them. It's not like they have an army. They have twenty people, including children."

"And if they throw Ruth and Marie into the line of fire?" John asked.

"Use blanks, just knock every Athosian you see out," Caldwell replied, "Fire as soon as you see one. Don't let them talk," he stared up as the lights in the command centre flickered.

"They're messing with the power distribution," Rodney called from across the room, "How, I don't know. Best guess – they're just pulling crystals and wires."

"Look, I am not being responsible for the death of two children!" John snapped, heading across the room to check the readout with McKay.

"We don't negotiate with terrorists," Caldwell shot back, "Doctor Weir would tell you that herself," he glanced back to where she had been standing, "…or she will."

"Elizabeth?" John shouted across the command centre. His eyes fell on the console on which he had set his P-90.

Elizabeth, and the P-90, were gone.


	13. Chapter 13

"Crap, I gotta stop her," John uttered, breaking into a run.

"Stop her? What about stopping them!" Rodney shouted after him, "And just how do you expect to stop them on your own? Never mind the fact that Elizabeth just took your-"

"I know!" he snapped in response, "She isn't thinking straight right now and-"

"Oh, come on, like Elizabeth would actually-"

"Rodney!" John shouted, "It might be Elizabeth with that gun out there, but it's different when it's your own blood and you know it. You say you'll die and kill for your friends and people you love, but there _is_ a difference, no matter how damn small, when it's your family at risk! Do you really want her to find out that difference right now?"

"We have a bunch of insane Athosians trying to take out the city. As much as I care for Elizabeth, I think we have to prioritise right now!" McKay replied.

"You prioritise. I'm going to find Elizabeth. And the kids."

"Sheppard," Ronon blocked his path, "Like McKay said, we've got a load of spaced Athosians out there, Teyla too, and-"

"Wait," Rodney frowned, "Teyla doesn't have regular contact with the Mainland, does she?"

"Not regular as in 'weekly phone call' regular, but she's been trying to convince this lot not to go for the past couple of weeks," John said.

"Then why is she out there with them? If she agreed with them and wanted to go, then she could have, at any time, nobody's holding her hostage here. It wouldn't have been smart of them to tell her 'oh, by the way, we're gonna try and destroy your city, want to lend a hand?'."

"Get to the point, McKay," Caldwell implored.

"When has Teyla ever gone haywire before? Okay, she's not sleeping and has recently been doped up to the eyeballs, but when have you ever known Teyla to be like this?" Rodney questioned.

"…The Wraith…when she connects with a wraith…" John hesitantly replied.

"You said there were no Wraith ships in the vicinity. You said there weren't any ships!" Ronon sighed audibly, frustrated.

"I didn't said it had to be a ship. Just one wraith could do it. Okay, so it's not in the city, but there's a whole load of land out there…" Rodney proposed.

"We would have noticed any kind of Wraith ship in the atmosphere," Caldwell insisted.

John paused, "…Wait…" he held up a hand, "Teyla mentioned a fire on the Mainland a few days ago in one of her reports. You think something crashed?"

"No idea. But Teyla flipping out and these Athosians going whacko at the same time seems like too much of a coincidence to me. Come on, she can't be the only one who has some form of Wraith DNA, even a trace would do it. Think about it, generations of people, diluted DNA or not, it explains why it's not all their leaders or just an elite group with ideas," Rodney stressed.

"So something crashed. Big ball of fire, no maydays, no signals, nothing. A blip. How could anything survive that?"

"How have we survived out here so long? Why did we take this mission when we knew we could be dead as soon as we stepped through the 'gate? Who knows!" the physicist waved his arms in an overly animated manner, "But tell me you've got a better idea and I'll go with it!"

"Why didn't anyone pick up a signal, a life-sign?" Ronon asked.

"No idea," Rodney repeated, "But Carson was the last one out to the Mainland…and come on, you know him and Ancient technology…it's Carson!"

"Thank you, Rodney," Carson appeared at the edge of the command centre, looking rather worse for wear, "It's nice to know I have your confidence," he headed across to Ronon and John, "He's right though, nothing came up."

"Don't tell me they've got new technology…I'm not liking the sound of that…" John muttered.

"It's just an idea. Big fire, Athosians going crazy, Teyla too, not even on the Mainland? I can't think of anything else beyond some Athosian radicals…and that still doesn't explain Teyla going AWOL," Rodney said.

"Someone's gotta get over to the Mainland and check it out," Ronon proposed.

"Someone's got to stop Elizabeth," John reminded them.

"Someone's got to stop the bloody Athosians we've already got, let alone sort out the others," Carson added. He grimaced in pain, "Look, if Teyla's with them, with Ruth and Marie, and you're saying Elizabeth is somewhere out there too, you can't just go in and start firing, blanks or otherwise."

"I don't think Elizabeth has any intention of firing blanks at anyone intending harm to her nieces," Rodney ran a hand through his hair and almost collapsed on top of his laptop, "Someone decide what we're going to do before I go slowly mad."

"I was going to suggest pumping something through the air vents in the affected areas, but there's no telling if anything would work fast enough to prevent realisation and further damage before falling unconscious," Carson offered, "It took a hell of a lot to keep Teyla sedated."

"I think that's the best plan so far for what we've got going on here," John nodded, "Doesn't solve the problem though."

"Mainland," Ronon stated. He gave John a shove ahead of him, "Now. They can deal here, we can deal there."

"Keep open comms," Rodney insisted, "Even if it's just a huge burnt patch, we can keep you updated on the situation here." He blinked and belatedly glanced at Caldwell for permission.

"Go," the Colonel agreed, "Take a team with you. Don't alert the Athosians if you can help it. I don't want accusations of causing mass panic dropped at our feet."

"Got it," John reluctantly headed off. It wouldn't do for him to insist on staying to look out for Elizabeth and the girls. It was just the kind of focus splitting that she had always warned would happen sooner or later. Then again, Elizabeth herself wasn't exactly behaving rationally at the moment, so she technically had no right to give warnings or advice, past or present.

* * *

Elizabeth had no idea what she was doing when she swiped the P-90 and ran. She hated weapons. She was well aware that they sometimes had a necessary use, she wasn't that blind, but she had fought so long for different peoples to speak and not use unnecessary force that she felt like a complete hypocrite stalking the halls of Atlantis clutching a gun she couldn't convince herself to drop.

She also had no idea what she was going to do if she actually came across any of the Athosians. Perhaps she was counting on not encountering any of them. She didn't like to admit that the weapon in her hands actually gave her a sense of power, like she was doing something productive. Pulling the trigger, she suspected, would give her a sense of something entirely different, so she thought. She wasn't sure she wanted to find out what that would be. She correctly assumed it would be very different to the time Phoebus had used her to cause carnage. Elizabeth just hoped the sight of her, armed, would be enough to make anyone back down before she actually had to take action.

All she knew was that she would never forgive herself if something happened to Marie and Ruth. She had lost her sister and brother-in-law, and they had lost their parents; she wasn't prepared to lose anyone else, or for them to. Elizabeth sighed. She had doubted bringing them to the city in the first place. The danger had been her main concern. Not the schooling, not the social drawbacks, the damned danger that seemed to lurk round every corner of Atlantis.

One minute she thought she might not have made a bad mother after all, the next she was convinced that she had no right trying to play mom to her own daughter, let alone her niece. She had started to believe that she might not make as bad a parent as she suspected, having dealt with the girls relatively well, but now…now the people she loved the most were at risk. She suspected that if her nieces saw her with the gun she would terrify them. Probably make them as terrified as she was now.

Elizabeth heard a crackle of static in her ear and deactivated her comms. She knew she was behaving ridiculously. She didn't need to be told. She didn't want the guilt of ignoring the people who were looking out for her.

If this was what motherhood did to her, Elizabeth was more scared than she had ever been in her life. She wasn't sure she could handle what such feelings could drive her to do.

A part of her wished she had kept her daughter and learned sooner that emotions existed that ran deeper than simple love and devotion.

* * *

"They will not surrender the city," Teyla stated, "Nor will they abandon it."

"Whether they surrender or abandon Atlantis or not, this city will be destroyed by nightfall," Cyrelli narrowed her eyes, "They had no right to bring us here and I will not suffer whilst they rage a war against _us_-" she stopped and shook her head, "This city does not deserve to be standing."

"I agree," Teyla replied, "We had no choice when they awoke the Wraith and they were well aware that we would have to follow them. They manipulated our people." Her gaze fell on Ruth and Marie. She smiled slightly, "Give me the children. They trust me. They will not fight."

"They are less likely to fight if they are parted," Cyrelli lunged forward and gave Marie a shove towards Teyla, "You keep that one quiet. Younger girls are more apt to trust figures they know."

Marie landed in a heap at Teyla's feet and found herself hauled roughly to her feet, "Teyla…" she whimpered, afraid of such betrayal.

Teyla gripped the girl's arm viciously, "Quiet," she demanded.

Marie cried out, louder, as the grip intensified. She finally grit her teeth and fell silent, staring at the floor as Ruth struggled to reach her little sister.

"Shut down this area. None of their people are to enter or leave," Cyrelli ordered two of her accomplices into action, along with Teyla, "We have others still working on their power systems."

Teyla hauled the nearest door open, dragging Marie after her.

"RUTH!" the younger of the girls screamed.

Ruth redoubled her struggles to break free, "Marie!!" she kicked out before being pinned to the floor, "Don't hurt her! You hurt her and I swear I'll-"

Cyrelli laughed, "You'll what?" she shook her head, "Maybe best to tie that one down somewhere."

Ruth shrieked in fury before a sob escaped her. What was going on? She had been all for trying to believe what was happening around her, but this was a little extreme to take as the truth. She was going to wake up soon. She was going to wake up and Marie was going to be safe and sound in her room and their mom would wonder why she had been screaming in her sleep and everything would be fine.

Except she knew it wouldn't be.

Cyrelli dragged Ruth to her feet and kept a tight grip on her as she and the remaining Athosian left the labs in the same direction as Teyla. She waited before following and heading down the first corridor that branched away.

Teyla kept up a quick pace, her new companions having to struggle to keep up. Marie's feet practically dragged along the floor as she was hauled along beside her.

It was several minutes before Teyla slowed and glanced around.

"…T-Teyla…what…what're you-" Marie began. She didn't get to finish as she found herself shoved violently away and nearly collided with the wall of the corridor. She shook her head, dazed, before looking up. She saw one figure on the floor and another crumple to the ground beside the unconscious form.

"Teyla…"

"Go!" Teyla ordered, "Go, now! I do not know how long I will remain in this state, so please, Marie, go! Run, straight along this corridor, pass your hand across the sensors to open the doors."

"But-"

"Marie! Now!" Teyla pressed a hand to her head in pain, "Tell…tell them…I do not think Cyrelli is fighting for the Athosians…perhaps none of them are… Go!" she repeated. The girl still gawped at her, afraid. She raised her voice again, "GO!"

Marie ran, terrified.

Teyla stumbled around for a few paces, still spaced out, and sank down in the middle of the corridor. She had to move before she was discovered. She suspected she would be in a great deal of pain once the drugs wore off, after brutally dispatching her 'comrades' as quickly as she could to give Marie a chance.

She forced herself to her feet and tripped her way down the corridor.

* * *

Cyrelli had not managed to get as far as she liked before she was faced without another obstacle. She halted, frowning, trying to make out the figure ahead of her in the darkness. It didn't move. Possibly one of her own? Anyone else would have run, surely.

Ruth's eyes widened, "Aunt Lizzie!" she cried.

Elizabeth raised the P-90 in her hands, "Get your hands _the hell off my daughter!_"


	14. Chapter 14

"Scorched earth," John muttered, pulling various aspects of the Puddlejumper's sensors up onto the view screen, trying to find something of use.

"Meteor, ship, arson?" Ronon questioned.

"I think we can rule out arson. Why would the Athosians burn their own land? And then pretend it wasn't them?"

"Farming cultures burn remnants of crops to-"

John shook his head. "Never mind."

"There's gotta be a trace of something," Ronon insisted, already growing impatient.

"Well, whatever it was, seems it got smashed to hell when it hit. There's not even a small section of debris. Just the scorched earth, like someone spontaneously combusted on the spot."

Ronon chose to ignore the quip, moving on to suggest, "A pod? They're small. Not designed for crash landings."

"…Pods are designed working on the theory they'll be retrieved or make a reasonably safe landing…right?" John called back to the team in the Jumper with them. "Right?"

A serious of non-committal grunts and mumbles met his ears.

"They've gotta be quick and efficient. Why design an escape pod to expect to survive a serious impact when the whole point is escaping? You don't run to an escape pod and think it's your best option, you run to it to escape," Ronon reasoned.

John didn't supply a response for almost a minute. He sat staring straight ahead, eyes a little glazed over. The Colonel jumped when Ronon smacked him on the shoulder. "Wait, what the…"

Ronon narrowed his eyes. "Sheppard…"

"I don't feel so great…" John shook his head and squared his shoulders. "Anyone else?" he called.

One of the team was doubled over, head on his knees, and only managed to look up for a moment before curling back again. "…Not feeling so hot, Sir."

"Dizzy?"

"Yes, Sir…"

John gestured forward and grimaced. "…Something…or someone, really doesn't want us here."

"What do you mean?" Ronon asked, tensing.

"Well, I know we need to carry on, and we are, but I really don't want to go any further, and that's just stupid." He called back over his shoulder, "You feel sick?"

"Sorta…"

"He knows what I mean. I don't want to go, but I know we have to, so-"

"Wraith," Ronon surmised. "You sure you're not just concerned about what's happening in the city?"

"It's because I'm concerned that I know we have to go on!" John protested.

"Wraith with a reach this far… Wraith queen."

"Stupid Wraith queen."

"Makes it easier for us."

John rolled his eyes. "Speak for yourself." He adjusted the vector the Jumper was travelling along. "Landing in just over a minute. And for god's sake, if I end up cowering in the corner and screaming, nobody is ever to repeat what happened today. Got it?"

* * *

Cyrelli smiled, clearly delighted by this new turn of events. "The girl is yours?" she asked, barely able to hide her surprise. 

"She's mine." Elizabeth nodded. The Athosian didn't know, Ruth didn't know; no harm was being done. Ruth wouldn't understand her words to be true. Cyrelli wouldn't be aware that they were ever so slightly false either.

"She doesn't call you 'mother'."

Elizabeth tightened her grip on the P-90 she held. "She's _mine_, she's my daughter, _my girl_, you give her back to me or I-"

"Or you'll what? I heard you were a diplomat, Doctor Weir. I took you at your word. How proficient are you with weaponry? Could you hit me before I snap her neck? Do you trust yourself not to hit this darling child?" Cyrelli taunted.

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes. She suddenly understood how John had had the confidence to taunt Kolya in return, when she had been the one in the grip of the enemy. She couldn't hit Ruth. She _wouldn't_ hit Ruth, because it just wasn't an option. She couldn't envision it happening, it was an impossibility. "I'm not aiming at her," Elizabeth shot back.

"You're also not in any position to argue with me."

Ruth felt a cold hand wrap around the back of her neck. She looked from Elizabeth to the floor and closed her eyes tight.

* * *

"There's no one here." 

"There's someone here, because every step I'm taking feels like someone's shoving me in the other direction!"

"I feel fine. Only three of you can feel whatever this is, and some of them might just be paranoid," Ronon stated.

"Hey!" John snapped. "If I'm right-"

"You mean if I'm right."

"Fine, if you're right then it means another Wraith queen gone, okay!?"

"And another-" Ronon stopped dead. "Something's moving…"

A grey figure was slumped at the base of a nearby tree, trying to drag itself to its feet. Features that would have marked the figure as wraith were hidden under caked blood and dirt, swirling markings barely visible beneath the grime. It stumbled and fell back against the trunk of the tree, hissing a warning. It was only on approaching the figure that it became clear that it was female, indeed most likely a queen…and missing nearly half of its right arm.

John couldn't make prolonged eye-contact with the wraith, for all his trying. He kept blinking between the figure and the ground. "It's…she's…just a kid!" he exclaimed.

"That's no kid," Ronon answered, weapon aimed directly at the young queen's head.

"Explains a lot," one of the team offered.

"What?" Ronon demanded.

"Well…if she's a queen. She's young. From what we know of their society, it means she was probably thrown out of her Hive by a senior queen, maybe even her mother. She's definitely not a kid in their eyes. Queen must've seen her as a threat. It would have led to conflict between them, one the senior queen might not have won. It makes sense for her to have forcibly banished a rival."

John's facial features twisted against his growing headache. "She's watching us. She can barely move and she's missing half an arm! She's just a kid…wraith or not, I gotta tell you this doesn't sit right."

The Major who had spoken up before raised her voice again. "She isn't a child, Colonel. She's dangerous. If another queen saw her as a threat, then she is one. Who do you think is creating hell with us, not to mention back in the city?"

"Why the Athosians?" Ronon asked. "Why mess with them?"

She shrugged. "Her only way of doing things. We still don't know what having Wraith DNA can do to a person. Teyla can connect with them, can't she? This…woman…wraith…queen…she isn't an adult queen. She's not at full strength. She can't make us leave. Maybe she can only manipulate them. She must know about Atlantis and what it means to the Wraith. She could just be trying to prove herself for all we know. She must know she's dying."

"…So…putting her out of her misery…" John mulled the idea over.

Ronon shook his head. "We don't have a choice. She's gonna die either way. We kill her, we don't have to harm the crazy Athosians. We still don't know where Weir and those kids are, remember?"

The young queen hissed again and tried to clamber to her feet. "…I…you…"

John looked away, grimacing once more. The queen might not have had the ability to take control of his mind, but she knew how to cook up one hell of a headache. "Do the honours then," he said to Ronon.

A flash of energy later and the wraith crumpled to the ground.

* * *

Ruth surprised herself by crying out as Cyrelli's nails dug into the back of her neck. She hadn't expected that she would actually feel the pain of her neck snapping, since it would have been so quick and so…final. But her neck wasn't snapping and suddenly the cold hand was gone. She heard a shout that wasn't her own, then a sharp, loud noise that echoed. The girl fell forward and scrambled across the corridor to her aunt's side.

The P-90 clattered to the floor as Elizabeth knelt to haul a shaking Ruth into her arms. "…It's okay…it's okay…" she murmured, gripping her child to her and rocking her as if she were a baby. She didn't take her eyes off the still form of Cyrelli for a moment. She had never shot a human being before of her own volition.

It took several long minutes of silence from Ruth for her to piece together what had just happened. "…She let go before you shot her," she mumbled into Elizabeth's shoulder.

"I know."

"Then-"

"I wasn't taking any chances. You both cried out and I had to do something." Elizabeth made sure Cyrelli's chest was still rising and falling. "I didn't kill her, Ruth."

The dark-haired girl slowly pulled away from her aunt and looked back at the body on the floor. Cyrelli was indeed still breathing, though blood spilled from a wound just below her right shoulder.

"I _didn't kill her_…" Elizabeth repeated, more to herself than Ruth.

Ruth was pale and still shaking. Unable to even contemplate evaluating the words spoken before the shot rang out, she threw herself back at Elizabeth and hugged her tightly to her.

About to speak, Elizabeth jumped as she heard another voice to the left of her.

"…Elizabeth?"

"Teyla!" She stared across at her friend, noting she was blinking repeatedly and swaying slightly on her feet. "Are you-"

"I am…not feeling so great," Teyla said. "It is gone…" she breathed. "It's gone…"

"What is?" Ruth uttered.

"…Whatever was inside our heads…" She staggered to the nearest wall and slumped down beside Elizabeth and Ruth. "…It was…compelling us…"

"You mean they don't want to leave? They don't really want to destroy the city?"

Teyla shook her head. "No…"

"Do you know where Marie is?" Elizabeth asked softly.

"I…I…think I let her go…I took her away and…told her to run back…to…"

Elizabeth reached across to check Teyla's pulse as she slipped into unconsciousness. Reassured by a strong, steady, beat, she wrapped both arms back around Ruth and rested her head on top of the child's. She exhaled and closed her eyes for a moment. "She's okay," Elizabeth assured Ruth. She activated her comms. "This is Weir. I need a med team down here. One gunshot wound, one unconscious. Teyla is here, as is Ruth. Any word on Marie?"

"She's here, Doctor Weir," Caldwell responded. "Ran in screaming a minute or so ago. She's in one piece. We have some rather confused Athosians milling about though."

"…I know. Contact Doctor Heightmeyer, please. I want all medical staff on duty too, as soon as possible." She reluctantly left Ruth on one side of the corridor and scrambled to check Cyrelli's wound. Elizabeth sat there, reminding herself to breathe, applying pressure to the wound and gazing at her daughter in silence until the medics arrived.

* * *

"It could have been worse."

"I suppose so."

"Many more could have died."

"I still have letters to write."

"The girls are okay," John insisted.

Though distracted, Elizabeth seemed to pay more attention to that remark. "They're alive. They're not…okay. They've seen someone be killed. They've been held hostage. Ruth saw me shoot Cyrelli. They've seen all manner of things that I hoped I might be able to keep from them for a few months, not a couple of weeks." She was hiding behind her desk, as ever, pretending great interest in what was on her computer screen.

John, in his usual fashion, had his feet kicked up on said desk. "They're young. They're kids, they'll bounce back, it's what they do."

"What was the final word on the little wraith queen?"

"Elizabeth…"

"It's information we have to have if-"

"'Lizabeth!" John snapped.

She sighed and looked down at her desk. "…Ruth wouldn't even look at me this morning. Though I catch her staring when she thinks I'm not looking. Marie is mostly her normal self, if a little shaken. She's bouncing back… Ruth…isn't so much."

"Maybe she needs-"

"I said she was my daughter," Elizabeth interrupted. "I yelled at Cyrelli and it just…happened."

It took John a little longer than usual to provide a reply. "…Would…it be so bad?" he asked.

"What?"

"Being her mother."

"I _am_ her mother now. Marie's too."

"You gotta explain things to her before she comes to her own conclusions. Whether it's the truth or not. Would it be so bad if she called you 'Mom'?"

"Yes," Elizabeth instantly answered. "I wasn't her mother, I gave her up. Karin was her mother. I can't expect Ruth to accept everything this quickly, if ever! It isn't fair to either of the girls. They think they're sisters, and I know that won't change between them, but…" She struggled to find the words to explain. "…As their aunt…this whole incident is the first thing I did 'wrong'. I was rather absent and I didn't always visit for longer than a few hours, but I wasn't a bad _aunt._ I am a bad _mother_. This was my first mistake. Ruth doesn't need to know that I've made more in the past. Marie doesn't need to know Ruth isn't her sister."

"…You could lose Ruth if you don't tell her now. Now's your chance."

"I know," she breathed. "I know."


	15. Chapter 15

Elizabeth knew that it wasn't just Ruth who had been staring at her over the past few days. Some of them glanced at her with approval, others with concern, clearly wondering what risks she was willing to take to protect her nieces. Both John and Caldwell had sought her out at one time or another to have 'a quiet word' about her conduct, whilst Ronon had congratulated her for taking the matter into her own hands. She wasn't quite sure whether he was joking or not.

Cyrelli was still unconscious in the Infirmary, though her bullet wound seemed to be the least of her problems. Most of the other affected Athosians had been treated and returned to the Mainland, though some still remained in the city in various states of mental disarray. It seemed the strongest links the wraith had made had been to Cyrelli, Teyla and some of the children. Questioning revealed that Cyrelli had voiced concerns over their situation before the wraith had started to play on those fears and exaggerate them, suggesting that she had perhaps been more willing than the rest. The children had been more easily manipulated. Teyla had drawn attention to herself by fighting the unsteady link and suggestions. As Rodney said, the young queen they had found had had, "power, but no idea how to use it,".

Elizabeth was still left with the problem of what to do about Ruth. Though the girl seemed to behave in a normal manner with Marie, whenever it was just the two of them alone, the only responses Elizabeth received were usually one word answers or vague statements. John was the only one who knew that her dilemma was constantly on her mind. Others assumed it was her recent behaviour and the injury she had caused Cyrelli that was eating away at her. Maybe she had just scared Ruth. Perhaps she hadn't jumped to conclusions. There was no way to know without asking.

* * *

Marie decided to use the half-hour break between afternoon lessons to visit Teyla, who she had been avoiding since she had been sent running back to the command centre. She knew Teyla was still in the Infirmary, as were several other Athosians, and whilst Marie wasn't sure that she was really ready to set eyes on either Teyla or Cyrelli, she felt she should be more grown-up about the whole situation and face her fears. 

Carson found her as she lingered at the entrance to the Infirmary, still trying to decide whether to go ahead or not. "Marie? Are you feeling okay?" he asked.

She bobbed her head and fidgeted. "I…erm…I came to see Teyla…if she's okay…and people are allowed to see her."

He waved her inside and made the decision for her. "She's doing fine. I'm sure she'll appreciate your company." Carson guided the girl through the Infirmary, tactfully avoiding the bed with the curtains drawn around it, on which Cyrelli lay still unconscious. "Teyla, visitor for you," he called.

Teyla blinked and quickly propped herself back against the pillows behind her. She was silent as Marie slowly approached, aware of her hesitation. She didn't try to smile, for fear that it would be considered patronising of her.

"…Hi," Marie said quietly, stopping a couple of feet away from the bed.

"Hello, Marie. How are you today?"

"I'm fine…thank you." She fidgeted on the spot again before holding her hands behind her back. "I only have half an hour," she said, as if it explained a lot. "I thought I'd…see how you are."

Teyla wasn't slow to notice that the girl before her was somewhat frightened. It was fair enough, she thought, considering what she had witnessed, Teyla's own strange transformation from friend to captor included. "I feel a lot better. I would like to leave, but Doctor Beckett insists that I was unwise to fight the little queen and should wait until he is sure everything is back to normal."

"…What is the 'little queen'?" Marie asked, curiosity getting the better of her. "Everyone's talking about it…her…saying she caused everything that…happened."

Teyla nodded. "…There are some of us who have a link to her people, the Wraith, in our genes, and we can manipulate them and they us, in small ways. Since the queen they found wasn't an adult, she did not have quite the same strength or impact…she made some errors and played on fears… She made us do things we did not wish to do. We were all caught up in it."

"So you didn't mean to-"

"No. I did not. Nor did the others."

Marie nodded and stared at the floor.

"I am very sorry for hurting you. I meant to get you both away from the others, but I had to pretend and try and fight the little queen at the same time," Teyla tried to explain. "If it wasn't for Doctor Beckett trying to help me beforehand I would not have been lucid enough to try it. It may have been an error, but I could not-"

Marie was suddenly beside the bed and tugging absently at the blankets. "It's okay," she said. "I mean, if you didn't mean to do it. If you hadn't dragged me all that way then…" She shivered, remembering the crunch of a neck snapping. "…Well…yeah."

Teyla tentatively reached to lay a hand against the girl's cheek. "I am sorry you had to witness everything you did," she murmured.

Marie closed her eyes and twitched her shoulders. "I gotta grow up sometime, right?"

"Perhaps not quite yet."

Marie sat on the edge of the bed. "Well," she tried to change the subject, "half an hour. What do you want to talk about?"

"How are your lessons going?" Teyla smiled and shifted to make more room for her companion.

"…Doctor McKay thinks that Ruth and I don't read fast enough." Marie made a face. "But have you seen how many typos there are in the worksheets he gives us?"

Until she had to run back to class, the laughter of Elizabeth's niece and her Athosian friend could be heard by most present in the Infirmary.

* * *

Early evening found Ruth alone in the quarters she shared with Marie, having practically inhaled her dinner and left the commissary as quickly as possible. Her sister, as far as she knew, was spending more time with Teyla in the Infirmary, whilst her aunt was working in her office. John had tried to encourage her into a game of…something (she hadn't really been listening) but she had made her excuses and left as soon as she had finished her food. 

Ruth looked up from her book when she heard the chime for the door. She set the book down, got up from her bed to answer the call, and found herself staring up at Elizabeth. She shook her head and looked away, backing into her quarters. "Aunt Lizzie…"

"Ruth," Elizabeth greeted. "Ruth, you know I didn't mean to scare you with-"

"You said I was your daughter," Ruth stated, deciding to get some answers there and then. "'My girl'."

Elizabeth sighed and glanced down.

Ruth sat down on the end of her bed. "Am I?" she questioned, voice shaking. "Am I yours, like you told that woman?"

Having changed her mind about telling the truth or not every other minute of the day, Elizabeth was somewhat thrown by the onslaught of questions. She ran a hand through her hair and moved to sit on the end of Marie's bed. "Legally speaking, both you and Marie are my daughters now. So yes, you are my daughter. You're in my care and I am your guardian. I am your mother in that respect."

Ruth entwined her fingers in her lap and gazed down at them. "…Our eyes are the same," she said softly. "Yours and mine…Marie's are different."

Elizabeth swallowed, nervous. "They're the same as your grandfather's. His eyes were like ours."

"Are you my mother?" the girl asked again. "Is that why we're here with you instead of with one of our uncles or Grandma?"

"You're here with me because your mom and dad wanted me to look after you."

Ruth's voice rose insistently, demanding an answer. "Because I'm yours?"

There was no turning back now. Lying would cause more damage than the truth would, if ever she was caught in her lie in later years. Elizabeth made sure she maintained eye-contact with her daughter as she spoke. "…You…were born to me. Your mom raised you as her own, because she and your dad could give you so much more than I could."

Ruth nodded slowly, eyes a little unfocused. "…Because you were here?"

"No, I had to go wherever I was sent. All over the world, Earth, that is. I was rarely home at all. I couldn't have taken care of you like a mother should. I wanted you to be safe and happy and…normal, not dragged around after me or waiting at home for a mother who was never there."

"You didn't even think to keep me?"

"Ruth, I couldn't. I wanted better for you. Your mom-"

"You're my mom!" Ruth snapped.

"Your mom," Elizabeth continued, "gave you a decent life and a home and a little sister. I knew you were better off with her. Your parents loved you like you were their own, you _were_ their daughter to them. I wasn't going to be an absent mother that you would resent. Your mom gave you things I couldn't give. You wanted for nothing with her and you would have been always lacking with me."

"…Do…do you know who my dad is?"

"Yes. I loved him. I know he loved me. We just…grew apart. He…doesn't know about you. I just couldn't…not keep you. Maybe it was selfish of me, but…" Elizabeth tilted her head and studied Ruth as if seeing her for the first time. "I know I made the right decision. You're a beautiful, intelligent young girl. I might be your biological mother, but your mom…Karrin, she made you who you are today. She adored you, you and Marie."

Ruth was shaking, though she folded her arms across her chest and tried to hold herself still. "…I miss her."

"I know. So do I."

"…Do…you want to be my mom?"

Elizabeth exhaled slowly. "…Only if you ever want me to be. I never want to replace her. She loved you and raised you. She did what I couldn't."

Ruth bit down on her bottom lip as if to keep from crying. "…Could you…er…could I be alone, please?" she asked, voice strangely high.

Fighting the urge to drag Ruth into her arms and comfort her, Elizabeth forced herself to her feet and to the door without another word. It was a relief to escape, though an ache consumed her as she walked quickly down the corridor, to anywhere, dashing unshed tears from her eyes.

* * *

It was during the early hours of the morning, what felt like only moments after she had finally fallen asleep, when Elizabeth was woken from an uneasy sleep by the door chime. If all was breaking loose, she knew there would have been more than a ringing chime to get her attention, and was right in suspecting that it was one of the girls. She had recently developed a habit of not locking her door, though both children still rang the chime more often than not. 

Marie appeared in the doorway, dressed in her pyjamas, barefoot and looking quite sorry for herself.

Elizabeth knew then that Ruth had told her everything. She sat up and held out her arms. "Come here," she called.

Her niece scampered quickly across the room, into Elizabeth's arms and under the bedcover. She sniffed, but otherwise remained silent.

"What is it?"

Marie sniffed again, burrowing into Elizabeth's embrace. "I tried to talk her out of it and I said it doesn't matter if she isn't really my sister, because she _is _my sister and I don't have any others, and why does it matter anyway if you're really her mom, because I know Mom loved us a lot and you have to be our mom now-"

"Marie… Tried to talk her out of what?" Elizabeth asked softly.

Marie shifted, eyes seeking out hers in the dim light. "…Ruthie wants to go home."


	16. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

"_I should never have let her go."_

"_You couldn't keep her here against her will."_

"_Mom can't take on a child at her age. I've taken Marie from Ruth and they should-"_

"_Marie chose to stay. You didn't force her; you gave her a choice. Ruth needs space and you've given that to her."_

"_Space. An entire galaxy." Elizabeth toyed absently with the stylus for her tablet. Her shoulders sagged. "Oh, I've been so stupid. It was selfish of me to tell her."_

_John didn't make eye-contact, staring at his feet, kicked up on her desk. "She would have found out sooner or later. Odds are she would have branded you a liar if you'd waited years."_

"_I'd rather be a liar than the enemy," she murmured._

_Now he did look up at her. "You're not the enemy."_

"_Then what am I?" Elizabeth demanded._

"_...You're a parent."_

* * *

Nine months, two new ZPM's and more stable and regular contact with Earth later, Elizabeth barely twitched when she heard the 'Gate spring to life. She wondered if it was possible to hide in a see-through room and whether she should be hiding in the first place. Staying put might seem unwelcoming. Lurking in the command centre might seem like a challenge. Damnit all. She pushed her chair back from the desk and headed for the door, taking slow, deliberate steps; watching where she set her feet and actually counting to distract herself each time one hit the floor again.

Nobody uttered a word to her as she crossed the command centre and made for the steps leading to the 'Gate. John bobbed his head and adopted her pace several steps behind her, trailing unobtrusively.

Marie was already in place, stepping backwards and forwards occasionally in an agitated manner. She smiled as the shield was lowered; a bright, longing expression that she managed to tone down a touch for fear that her long-awaited reunion might not take place in the coming moments.

Personnel and supplies began to spill from the 'Gate, amongst them a young girl, all lanky, angles and dark features. She wove her way through the milling crowd and around the crates in her path, her gaze fixed on one person alone.

"Ruth." There was Marie, trying to be ever so grown-up, her voice kept steady and no enthusiastic greeting. Gone was 'Ruthie' and this strange young woman before her was simply Ruth, whom she itched to embrace but was just that little bit afraid to touch.

"Marie." Ruth dropped her backpack to the ground, miscalculating its weight and sending it to the floor with a thud. The very image of the awkward teenager, she fought and lost the battle to seem aloof in a matter of moments, as she all but crushed her little sister to her. "I missed you."

"You didn't have to go," Marie quietly replied.

"I did. ...I did."

"Aunt Lizzie has new quarters for you and Doctor McKay has caught me up to your level, so we won't have to work so hard anymore and..." Marie blinked and stared for a moment. Things weren't the same anymore, the truth falling between the girls like a thick veil. Things were different now. Ruth saw the world in a way that Marie had yet to understand. Both girls had lost something dear; a sister in a sense that things would never seem quite as real ever again. But Ruth had lost an aunt and gained a mother...and yet felt like she had lost more than she ever had.

John had wandered through the crowd and started to rummage through one of the crates like a child. "Marie," he called. "New game I was telling you about. How about we let your aunt show your-" his pause was barely noticeable – not sister -, "Ruth her new quarters."

Marie nodded amicably. For all that she was still a child and still impatient to spend some time with Ruth, her months in Atlantis had started to teach her when to let go and when to 'play along'. "Alright," she said. She smiled up at her sister. "I'll catch up with you later. Teyla said she was going to make some tea for me to give you; I've been dying for you to try it all year." She headed obediently after John and was quite proud that she managed not to look back.

Though it had been Marie who had been learning to go without, make do, follow orders without backchat and run the hell for her life, it was Ruth who looked the worse for wear. Perhaps it was the shock of seeing the girl go from child to uncertain teenager, but Elizabeth could have sworn that her daughter had spent the last nine months in a prison cell and not with all her usual comforts on Earth. She had become accustomed to seeing drastic changes in both girls – the result of going months, sometimes years, without visiting them – but this was something else.

Ruth reclaimed her pack to busy herself as she greeted Elizabeth. "Hello."

"Hello, Ruth," Elizabeth responded, with false cheer. "It's good to see you."

The girl fidgeted. "You too," she said, automatically polite. Yet she continued in the observant, if forthright, fashion somewhat typical of a girl her age. "John proposed then," she stated, nodding towards the ring she had seen catch the light.

"...Not...exactly," Elizabeth replied, in a low voice. More of a promise and less of a marriage; what made an official marriage mean any more than the sentiment behind it anyway? "Let me show you your room."

Ruth nodded and followed a step behind.

Her quarters were opposite Marie's and somehow still far enough away from Elizabeth's to make the right point: Ruth was growing up now and nobody was going to force old relationships back into old patterns. Elizabeth hung back towards the front of the room as Ruth dropped her pack and headed across to the windows to examine the view.

"I don't think that'll ever get old."

"I can't say I'm bored with it yet, no." Elizabeth began to take a step forward to join her, but changed her mind and steadied herself again. "I'll let you get settled. You know where my quarters are, and John's. I suspect he and Marie are in her quarters playing that new game. You could join them, or go see Rodney – he says you don't have to start right away, by the way – or Teyla..." she trailed off, knowing she was babbling. "Anyway, my door is always open." She made to leave.

"…M-Mother?" Ruth called. 'Mom' sounded too familiar, 'Mom' had been Karrin. 'Mama' had been what she called her when she cried; what she and Marie had called her in private. 'Mommy' felt too childish, and besides…Elizabeth was none of them, not yet.

Elizabeth didn't turn, but she halted, one hand steadying her against the door. "Yes, Ruth?"

"…Thank you. For letting me come back, I mean. You didn't have to listen to me and…I didn't deserve it," the girl said, staring at the floor.

She nodded curtly, still processing that one word - _mothermothermother -_ and swiped her hand over the sensor for the door. "I'll always listen to you. Whenever you need me." Elizabeth responded, voice unsteady and sounding quite unlike her own. "That's what…mothers do."

**Fin**


End file.
